Konoha Chat
by uzumakiflashz
Summary: Since im also the type to depend on the summery, ill tell and warn you all ahead. All about the madness of a Konoha Chat room. Things go on that arent for the faint of heart. Rated M for yaoiyuri. Dont even want to think of the mass krazyness of pairings.
1. Chapter 1

Yoz! mind you i may not use every person below, but i may get around to them later on. Before you even start to read any of this, know that this is a yaoi story, which mean it involves stuff about men on men action, and maybe in some case yuri, girl on girl. depends on how my mind works at times. lol. here are the messager names

**Naruto: **BlondeKitsune

**Sasuke:** Ravenhair69

**Sakura:** Ms. Uchiha

**Kakashi:** IchaLover

**Ino:** Uchiha Wife

**Shikamaru:** TroublesomeShika

**Chouji:** Pleasantly Plump

**Asuma:** HeavySmoker

**Kiba:** Doggystyle101

**Hinata:** Hyuugaprincess2

**Shino:** Bugpoker54

**Kurenai:** Krazyeyez

**Lee:** Youthful Green beast

**Tenten:** Chickwithknifes

**Neji:** Freedestiny89

**Gai:** Sexy green beast

**Jiraiya:** PervertedStalker

**Tsunade:** BigBoobBlonde

**Iruka: **StudentSlave

**Anko:** Bloodlover99

**Konohamaru: **KonohaBrat11

**Ebisu: **Closetpervert

**Orochimaru:** Uchihalover

**Kabuto: **Medicalservent

**Itachi:** UchihaRuler001

**Kisame:** SharkBait002

**Sasori:** ScorpionPuppetMaster004

**Deidara: **ArtistofClay003

**Zetsu: **Weedplant007

**Tobi: **BakaN00b00?

**Hidan: **Fabiolookalike005

**Kakuzu: **Moneyman006

**The Akatsuki Leader: **Akatsuki Zero000

Meh. thats how it is until i mess up and just go with it. lol. Hope you end up liking my story.


	2. Chapter 2

Oy. here my first stab at it. i guess ill take all opinions of it. wont say i wont stab a bad reviewer, but yea... lol . hope you like it.

**BlondeKitsune:** Wow, im bored. Wonder were everyone else is at...

_**Ravenhair69 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1**_

**BlondeKitsune:** ... Err... Whos that?

**Ravenhair69:** ... dobe...

**BlondeKitsune:** Nani? Who is that?!

**Ravenhair69:** ... Dobe Kitsune

**BlondeKitsune:** ... What... Sasuke?

**Ravenhair69:** Yo

**BlondeKitsune:** NANI?! Baka Sasuke? didnt know you got onto konoha chat

**Ravenhair69:** Ive got my way koi...

**BlondeKitsune:** But how

**BlondeKitsune:** Wait, wat?!

**Ravenhair69:** Dont worry about it. Ill be back in a sec.

_**Ravenhair69 is busy**_

_2 Mintes Later_

_**Ravenhair69 Is Online**_

**BlondeKitsune:** Oy Teme, why you go off

**Ravenhair69:** I had... things to do.

**BlondeKitsune:** BAKA! TELL ME!

**Ravenhair69: **No.

**BlondeKitsune: **TELL ME!

**Ravenhair69:** No.

**BlondeKitsune:** TELMETELLMETELLMETELLMETELLMETELLMETELLME!

**Ravenhair69:** Kukuku. Your so cute when your annoyed

**BlondeKitsune: **Nani?! What he heck are you talkin about?

**Ravenhair69: **Like this morning when i didnt left you have the last cup of ramen for breakfast. You were so cute i could have jumped on you all over again right then

**BlondeKitsune: **HA! Like i would let you do that again. im still sore from last night. and why am i always uke?! Why cant we take turns?

**Ravenhair69:** Because your my bitch, Koi

**BlondeKitsune: **Teme!! Im noones bitch!

**Ravenhair69: **Thats not what you were telling me last night as i was beating your hole raw. kukuku.

**BlondeKitsune: **Sasuke! i only said stuff like that because you had me in a tight spot

**Ravenhair69:** Last time i check yo were the one with the tight spot

**BlondeKitsune: **Oi, because of that, your not getting any from me for awhile! HA!

**Ravenhair69:** Naru-koi, lets not go too far now...

_**Ms. Uchiha has logged on to Konoha Chat1**_

**Ms. Uchiha: **SASUKE-CHAN!!! YAY! YOUR ON! DIDNT KNOW YOU CAME HERE!

**Ravenhair69: **Sakura...

**BlondeKitsune:** SAKURACHAN!!!

**Ms. Uchiha:** Naruto...

**BlondeKitsune: **Oi, what are you doing on here?

**Ravenhair69: **Thats a question...

**Ms. Uchiha: **Because i was bored at home.

**Ravenhair69: **Why dont you go visit ino

**Ms. Uchiha: **Can i come visit you?!

**Ravenhair69:** NO.

**Ms. Uchiha: **Whhhhhhhy?

**Ravenhair69:** Because.

**BlondeKitsune: **... Because why Saskue teme?

**Ms. Uchiha: **Just because Naruto-Baka! Dont Mess with Sasuke-chan!

**Ravenhair69:** ... Sakura...

**Ms. Uchiha: **Be Back in a min. Mom is calling

_**Ms. Uchiha is busy**_

**Ravenhair69:** ... Okaaaaaaaaay.

**BlondeKitsune:** Oy, Sasuke teme, can i come over? im bored at home.

**Ravenhair69: **Only if we do something i want

**BlondeKitsune:** NOOOOOO! im still sore, remember!

**Ravenhair69: **so. ill just fuck the life out of you and then kepp on. you could always get sakura to heal your butt. kukuku

**BlondeKitsune: **very funny! now you can just go fuck the living out of your hand for all i care

**Ravenhair69:** ... Or i could take you on a date...

**BlondeKitsune: **Nani? date? where to?!

**Ravenhair69: **well, it would be to a place that would serve ramen i gather

**BlondeKitsune: **of course!

**Ravenhair69: **meh. i could always take you to the international house of ramen...

**BlondeKitsune: **NANI?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Ravenhair69: **one exclamation would have done...

**BlondeKitsune: **I NEVER KNEW OF SUCH A PLACE, LETS GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Ravenhair69: **Naru-chan, your caps is stuck again...

**BlondeKitsune:** oh, sorry. and i gather your paying?

**Ravenhair69:** err... im out of money since ive havent done any good missions lately to get spending money. but you know, fucking is free

**BlondeKitsune:** not really. i paid the price with my now sore ass...

**Ravenhair69:** but it was worth it though

**BlondeKitsune: **depends on who you ask.

**BlondeKitsune:** you maybe

**BlondeKitsune: **me, nope

**Ravenhair69:** Nani? so you didnt enjoy it?

**BlondeKitsune:** not in so many words...

**Ravenhair69:** but you kept telling me 'go deeper teme', 'harder, HARDER' as you scremed threw the halls of my house as i pretty much fucked you on every surface of the house.

**BlondeKitsune: **...

**Ravenhair69:** what, cat got your tounge... or is your mouth raw too?

**BlondeKitsune:** S-SHUT UP! you keep teasing me...

**Ravenhair69: **oy, coming from the main tease.

**BlondeKitsune: **ey, you had it comin

**Ravenhair69:** how?

**BlondeKitsune: **you said 'who will last the longest' and well, i did. hahaha

**Ravenhair69: **and now your ass is raw...

**BlondeKitsune:** ...

**Ravenhair69:** kukuku. so are you coming over or not?

**BlondeKitsune: **maybe. i can barely walk around my place, so i dont know...

**Ravenhair69:** i could always come and tend to you you know...

**BlondeKitsune: **but that would lead to... you know

**Ravenhair69:** well, hurry up, since sakura-forhead is about to come back on, and i perfer this not be a "team outting", you know

**BlondeKitsune: **meh. i pass. besides, Kiba is coming over later for ramen

**Ravenhair69: **WHAT?! KIBA?! ohhhhhhh, NO! im not letting kiba come over. he will be all over you

**BlondeKitsune:** ... he will?

**Ravenhair69:** Naruto, if you havent noticeed, your a hot piece of ass, that im sure anyone would want

**BlondeKitsune: **... really? then i dont have to settle for you?

**Ravenhair69: **GRRRRRRR. your trying to piss me off?

**BlondeKitsune:** maybe. lol.

**Ravenhair69:** fine. ill talk to you later then. who knows, i might just visit...

**BlondeKitsune: **oy, dont be so mad.

**Ravenhair69: **not mad. going to take a shower and... etc, and trust me, ill be thinking of you. later koi

**BlondeKitsune:** bye teme.

_**Ravenhair69 has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

_**BlondeKitsune has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

_**Ms. Uchiha is online**_

**Ms. Uchiha:** Oy, im back! Sasuke-chan! ... Sasuke-chan?... Naruto-baka? ... there gone already... oh well...

_**Ms. Uchiha has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

Yep, that was it. hope you like the first one, and i hope you tell me so. and if you want me to get krazyr with it, i need suger.


	3. Chapter 3

well, heres the second of my krazy thoughts. tell me wat you think of it.

**Pleasantly Plump: **So Shika, what are you doing today?

**TroublesomeShika: **hanging at home i guess

**Pleasantly Plump: **yea, me too. nothing to do really

_**Doggystyle101 has logged onto Konoha chat2**_

_**Uchiha Wife has logged onto Konoha chat2**_

**TroublesomeShika: **oy, two troublesome people

**Uchiha Wife: **who you callin troublesome?!

**Doggystyle101: **yea pineapple head!

**TroublesomeShika: **yo dog breath, go bone your dog for all i care

**TroublesomeShika: **and naruto while your at it

**Uchiha Wife: **nani? what about naruto

**TroublesomeShika: **its almost too obvious that kiba has a boner for naruto

**Doggystyle101: **oy, dont say that! naruto is mine and i wont let anyone get naruto!

**Uchiha Wife: **yes, we know. why dont you confess to him already

**Doggystyle101: **... he may be the best looking thing around, but i would think he knew about it

**TroublesomeShika: **i would count on it. that dunce wouldnt know someone liked him even if hes told they do

**Pleasantly Plump: **yea. shika makes a good point

**Uchiha Wife: **its not like your not that far from clueless than naruto, chouji

**Pleasantly Plump: **well your as much as a blonde dunce as he ino

**Uchiha Wife: **if you stoped munching on chips for half a sec, then you would know im much smarter than that brainless wonder, and dont get me started on you fa-

**TroublesomeShika: **INO! let all clam down, huh?

_**Bugpoker54 has logged onto Konoha chat2 **_

_**Hyuugaprincess2 has logged onto Konoha chat2**_

**Doggystyle101: **yoz hinata and shino

**Bugpoker54: **...

**Hyuugaprincess2: **h-h-hello k-kiba-kun

**TroublesomeShika: **wow hinata, you even studder online...

**Doggystyle101: **... yea...

**Doggystyle101: **and whats the point of being online if you dont talk shino?

**Bugpoker54: **... i talk...

**Uchiha Wife: **... wtf? that was bearly speech, and i rarely hear you talk in real life

**Bugpoker54: **...

**Doggystyle101: **ino, leave my team alone. your team not all that interesting. a lazyass, a ... plump guy, and a susuke nut, who is not even near interrested in you.

**Uchiha Wife: **DONT EVER SAY THAT!!! SASUKE WILL BE MINE!!!!!

_**Uchiha Wife has logged off of Konoha Chat2**_

**TroublesomeShika: **... any chance someone wants to tell her about sasuke and naruto?

**Hyuugaprincess2: **w-what about naruto-kun?

**Doggystyle101: **err, nothing hinata

**Hyuugaprincess2: **oh, ok. i hear b-brother neji calling, so im g-going. b-b-bye

_**Hyuugaprincess2 has logged off of Konoha Chat2**_

**TroublesomeShika: **... ok, now that both ino AND hinata are gone, should we talk about naruto and sasuke being gay and going out with each other?

**Pleasantly Plump: **... there going out?

**Doggystyle101: **wow, your slow chouji. ive know for awhile, and i aim to steal naruto from sasuke. naruto will be MINE!!!!!

**Pleasantly Plump: **.. hes starting to sound like ino...

**TroublesomeShika: **yea, thats always scary...

**Doggystyle101: **ANYWAY! Shika, i need your help!

**TroublesomeShika: **...Why me?

**Doggystyle101: **because i need your help in stealing Naruto from Sasuke

**Bugpoker54: **...

**Doggystyle101: **Shino, if your not going to talk, get offline!!!!!

**Bugpoker54: **...bye...

_**Bugpoker54 has logged off of Konoha Chat2**_

**TroublesomeShika: **hmm. looks like he took you seriously. oh well. anyway, i dont see how i can help

**Doggystyle101: **but-but-but you can use that HUGE brain of your to think of a way for naruto to fall in love with me rather than that loser sasuke! then his ass will be all mine so that i can-

**TroublesomeShika: **OK! if you stop that discripsion, ill help. geez, how troublesome

**Doggystyle101: **WOOHOO! now, what do you have in mind?

**TroublesomeShika: **You could always kidnap him and rape him...

**Doggystyle101: **... thats a good idea...

**TroublesomeShika: **it was a joke dogbreath

**Doggystyle101: **OY?! who you callin dog breath lazyass

**TroublesomeShika: **rather be lazy then to pratice my kissing on my dog...

**Doggystyle101: **??? how you find ou-

**Doggystyle101: **Err... dont know what you mean...

**Pleasantly Plump: **hehehe. Shikamaru is smart.

**Doggystyle101: **REALLY? i REALLY hadnt noticed that wideload

**Pleasantly Plump: **!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT!!!!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!

_**Pleasantly Plump has logged off of Konoha Chat2**_

**TroublesomeShika: **Hmm. i think Chouji broke his computer... again. but i would look over my shoulder, since he may come for you. and your little dog too.

**Doggystyle101: **NANI?! ... wait, do i hear yelling?

**TroublesomeShika: **ey kiba, by any chance do you have a web cam?

**Doggystyle101: **huh? yea, i do. hmm. that roaring is getting loader...

**TroublesomeShika: **do me a favor and turn it on. ... it will help me get you naruto

**Doggystyle101: **huh? OK!

**Doggystyle101: **WHA? CHOUJI? WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE!!! AHHHHESARHGWQRTHA RB QATNHJYZ SDAFH Y NMUJ M IK98 U MUHJ

**TroublesomeShika: **chouji, stop hetting him wit the key board...

**TroublesomeShika: **chouji, stop

**TroublesomeShika: **wait, put the computer screen down!

**TroublesomeShika: **... looks like kiba needs a new screen...

**Doggystyle101: **he...lp... m..e... s...o...sssssss...

_**Doggystyle101 has logged off of Konoha Chat2**_

**TroublesomeShika: **Hmm. i should help him out... maybe tomorrow after hes had a while to... heal

**TroublesomeShika: **... who am i talkin too? meh. too troublesome to keep this up

_**TroublesomeShika has logged off of Konoha Chat2**_

Yay, i did another one of my first one . well, tell me how you feel, and i wont let sakura and ino have there way with sasuke... or maybe i will. lol


	4. Chapter 4

Yoz. Meh, just your luck readers to bereading like the best story ever, but to have a lazy writer. lol. i have loads of ideas and what not(which whould point out the creativeness in this chapter lol) so yea, ill update we i do. i should either do it when im bored and im putting off homework, or the weekends. so yea. and if none of you have noticed, i dont think i put a disc;amer anywere, but maybe in the summery, so ill say it once. i dont own any of the konoha characters, so dont any one go sueing me. lol. anway, on with the story. and reminder: theres yoai/yuri (yes, i managed to add yuri. lol)

_**IchaLover has logged on to Konoha Chat3: Chunnin and up**_

_**StudentSlave has logged on to Konoha Chat 3: Chunnin and up**_

**StudentSlave: **Oy, Kakashi

**IchaLover: **yoz

**StudentSlave: **kakashi-domo, why dont you come over to my place later

**IchaLover: **... for what?

**StudentSlave: **Well, i was hoping for a second chance to get you into bed. last night was ruined by sasuke having coming over to your place while we were making out and complained all night about naruto having ramen with kiba

**IchaLover: **... to be fair, naruto came in and walked in on us... you know, so that he could get you to get ramen

**StudentSlave: **oh yea...

**IchaLover: **good thing he dense enough to belive that we were playing leap frog... wow, that dunce...

**StudentSlave: **Ey, dont call naruto that! im his father figure, so i must defend him always. and speaking of which, we should talk to him

**IchaLover: **"we"? why and about what?

**StudentSlave: **well, "we" since its easyer as a group, and he should know were a couple. and we should give him the talk

**IchaLover: **... WHAT talk

**StudentSlave: **THE talk

**IchaLover: **OHHHHHH. THAT THE talk. well, i whould think he known already...

**StudentSlave: **why would you say that?

**IchaLover: **well, him and sasuke are a coupe, right? and ive seen both sasuke with a simle or two, and naruto barely able to sit down. both on the same days. put two and two together...

**StudentSlave: **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! MY PURE WHITE UNSPOILED NARUTO!!!!!!!!! PURE WHITE SNOW HAS BE CURUPTED BY THE MUD OFF THE BOTTOM OF A SHOE THAT IS THAT UCHIHA!!!! I WILL RESTORE MY NARUTOS LIGHT THAT HAS BE COVERED!!!!!!!!

**IchaLover: **err... might what to chill out a bit koi. naruto knew what he was doing and so did susuke, so naruto isnt blameless.

**StudentSlave: **...BUT MY NARUTO...

**IchaLover: **ikura, youve left on yur caps again...

**StudentSlave: **opps. sorry. anyway, we should still have that talk with naruto

**IchaLover: **why? he must already know about sex.

**StudentSlave: **be he must know about safe sex. it seems as hes uke, or bottom, so he must be safe not to catch anything from that uchiha dirty sonofa-

**IchaLover: **now clam down already. only thing we could do is give them ideas for new position. i think we invented a few now that i recall...

**StudentSlave: **NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! HE WILL NEVER, EVER DO THOSE MOVES!!! THEY ARE SHAMELESS!!!! THEY LACK TASTE. THEY ARE SO CRUDE!!!

**IchaLover: **and if i recall, you made them and insisted that i use them on you...

**StudentSlave: **NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**IchaLover: **your caps again...

**StudentSlave: **oh yea. opps. anyway, we should be sure. i will make it easyer to understand by use explaing it to naruto online later on it may be betterm since it will be in writing

**IchaLover: **will, if you really see the need. but we should do it at your place, both of us being there, so that we can show him hows its properly done, if you catch my drift

**StudentSlave: **kakashi-koi! please dont even think of making anruto watch us. it would be too embarrising to do. and that would just subject him to watching porn on the internest. then he might just wonder into porn site and... just... too... much...

**IchaLover: **oy, im sending you a pic i just took. look at it plz.

**StudentSlave: **NANI??????????!!!!!!!!! your naked, and... wow. that is a nice pic. WAIT! DONT TRY TO DISTRACT ME!!!!!!

**IchaLover: **...

**StudentSlave: **...

**StudentSlave: **anyway, so what should we do later?

**IchaLover: **well, maybe you should get together at my place and we could finish what we started.

**StudentSlave: **well, im up for that. maybe this time i could try this one move i was thinking of...

_**HeavySmoker has logged on to Konoha Chat 3: Chunnin and up**_

_**Krazyeyez has logged on to Konoha Chat 3: Chunnin and up**_

**IchaLover: **hmm. looks like we have company...

**StudentSlave: **yes. hello Asuma-sensei, Kurenai-sensei.

**HeavySmoker: **Oy. you two cybering again?

**IchaLover: **like i would admit that

**HeavySmoker: **well, you do like to brag some...

**Krazyeyez: **yes, like how you just made iruka-sensei non-walkable for a week...

**StudentSlave: **kakashi!!!

**IchaLover: **opps. did i say that... well, its not like im the only one whos be braging. i think you said the same thing about Kurenai about 3 days ago.

**Krazyeyez: **Asuma!!!

**HeavySmoker: **opps. hehe. looks like we all have some secrets...

**Krazyeyez: **like how you stil sleep with your thumb in your mouth?

**HeavySmoker: **Kurenai!!! howd you fined out about tha- err, i mean, i have no clue what you mean hehehe...

**StudentSlave: **...

**IchaLover: **...

**Krazyeyez: **well, you were sleeping in a fetal position and with your thumb in your mouth, cluching a teddybear that came out of nowhere.

**HeavySmoker: **!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! crap...

**StudentSlave: **ANYWAY hows it going between you two nowadays? how long have you two be together again?

**HeavySmoker: **its been about 5 months

**Krazyeyez: **... its been 7...

**HeavySmoker: **really? hmm. you must count from when we first started to go out. i count from when we hopped into your bed anf fu- err... never mind. ill take your word for it. how ling has it been for you two kakashi?

**IchaLover: **its been 4 months

**StudentSlave: **no, its also been 7...

**IchaLover: **oh... well, you count when we first went out. i count... when we first started to share apartments?

**HeavySmoker: **nice save kakashi

**IchaLover: **i know huh?

**StudentSlave: **not that nice...

_**Bloodlover99 has logged on to Konoha Chat 3: Chunnin and up**_

**Bloodlover99: **Kurenai!!!!!!!!! yay! your on!!! how bout we go privite and cyber??

**HeavySmoker: **??????!

**IchaLover: **!!!!??

**StudentSlave: **wtf??????????????

**Krazyeyez: **err... anko, we settled this already long ago...

**Bloodlover99: **i know, but im extra horny today!!

**Krazyeyez: **so. thats in the past anko

**Bloodlover99: **come on my little krazy eyes, you know yopu still have feelings for me. still dont know why you left me for that pot smokin bozo

**HeavySmoker: **im like right here...

**Bloodlover99: **SOOOOOO!!!! and like im said, im horny, so why dont you come over and play around you know you loved it when i used to use my snakes and have them go in and out of your-

**Krazyeyez: **ANKO! i said know. that part of my life is behind me now.

**Bloodlover99: **hmm. i think you need some convincing. ive got something to show you. here, im turning on my web cam now...

**Krazyeyez: **... a-a-anko!

**HeavySmoker: **...wow

**StudentSlave: **woah!

**IchaLover: **err... yea...

**Bloodlover99: **yea, look at my tits!!! there bigger then ever. and im just drooling. and not from my mouth. from my "lips" if you catch my drift. i could show you if you want-

**Krazyeyez: **NO! anko, how may time do i have to tell you that no matter how many times you strip for me, use be as your striper pole, rub me in al lthe right places, nibble on my ear, grab my boobs, and work my nipples, i will never come back to you!! now get over it! im with asuma now, and im happy!

**HeavySmoker: **...err... wow...

**IchaLover: **yep...

**Bloodlover99: **so what!! what does he have that i dont?!

**IchaLover: **... a dick?

**StudentSlave: **and tickleish beard?

**HeavySmoker: **and i can give her children...

**Bloodlover99: **SOOOOOOOO!!! i can get of those!!

**StudentSlave: **... how?

**Bloodlover99: **i know a guy from suna. he will make me a man, and while i can probolly never give you child,m we can adopt! i never grew up with my original parants, and look how i turned out!!!!! MUHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

**StudentSlave: **...

**HeavySmoker: **...

**IchaLover: **...

**Krazyeyez: **... well, besides the fact, i still have no more feeling for you. and if you must know, asuma can be caring. all you want to do is fuck like an animal. all we have together is incedible sex that can never be followed up by anyone!

**HeavySmoker: **... yea, like thats not a shot at me...

**Bloodlover99: **...so you really mean i cant have you back?

NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! ive told you this more than a hundred times!! now will you please, PLEASE, just let this go?!

**Bloodlover99: **well, ok. but i will never forget... us.

neither will i...

**Bloodlover99: **will... i guess i should move on...

**StudentSlave: **er, anko, we can see your evil grin

**Bloodlover99: **opps. oh well, might as well tell you. I WILL NEVER LET MY KRAZY EYES GO!!!!! NEVER!!!! HERE I COME MY LOVE!!!!

_**Bloodlover99 has logged off of Konoha Chat 3: Chunnin and up**_

**StudentSlave: **... uhh... i think you have a stalker coming to your house to have her way with you Kurenai-sensei...

**Krazyeyez: **i fear you are right... hmm. can i come over to your house, Asuma?

**HeavySmoker: **err... sure. ill protect you from anko.

**Krazyeyez: **thx. well, ill leave now. bye kaakshi, iruka. see yo later

**StudentSlave: **err, yea

**IchaLover: **later...

_**Krazyeyez has logged off of Konoha Chat 3: Chunnin and up**_

**IchaLover: **... so, looks like your girlfreind was a lesbian

**StudentSlave: **...yea...

**IchaLover: **so, how do you feel?

**HeavySmoker: **... i feel... i feel... i ... feel... GREAT!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!! IM SLEEPING WITH A LEZ!!!! WOOHOO! NOW SHE MIGHT LET ME BRING ANOTHER WOEMN FOR A THREESOME R I COULD JUST WATCH THEM!!!!!! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!! WOOHOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I MUST PERPARE!!!!!!

_**HeavySmoker has logged off of Konoha Chat 3: Chunnin and up**_

**IchaLover: **... o...k...

**StudentSlave: **yea...

**IchaLover: **anyway, we need to talk to naruto later and give him the talk, but you can come over and give me the talk... with demostrations of course

**StudentSlave: **that dont sound too bad. well, as long as im seme, and not uke this time. your always seme...

**IchaLover: **well, im more dominate, and last time i remember, you liked that. how you screamed in my ear "OH KAKASHI, OH MY GOSH!!" as i banged the life out of you on your table.

**StudentSlave: **err... yea... well, ill come over your house this time. lucky, im not sore anymore, so its ok.

**IchaLover: **so i can be as rough as i want. SWEET!

**StudentSlave: **... no. that means not to do it aain when i have school to teach in the morning

**IchaLover: **well, to be fair, we did it at like five in the morning, so yea...

**StudentSlave: **ANYWAY, ill come over

**IchaLover: **ok, and besure not to past anko on the way here. im not sure, but i know you were oogling her topless, and i also fear she may still be topless, running around konoha, horny...

**StudentSlave: **...i see your point. well, ill be there soon...

**IchaLover: **sooner than later!

**StudentSlave: **we'll see. wink

_**StudentSlave has logged off of Konoha Chat 3: Chunnin and up**_

**IchaLover: **oy. he pushes my bootons. now i must be extra hard on him. hehehehee.

_**IchaLover has logged off of Konoha Chat3: Chunnin and up**_

**PervertedStalker: **...

**TroublesomeShika: **see, i knew they wouldnt notice us here...

**PervertedStalker: **well, shikamaru, looks like i own you. with this new information, i have just the stuff to make my new book

**TroublesomeShika: **new book? about two guys?

**PervertedStalker: **NOOOO!!!! NEVER!!!!!! about two GIRLS!!! it will be "Icha Icha Violence: Female Stalker" it will be a best seller! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

**TroublesomeShika: **... yea. anyway, you said you owned me one

**PervertedStalker: **not just one, but like three!

**TroublesomeShika: **well, right now i need a favor

**PervertedStalker: **name it and its yours! let me guess, yo want that blonde number named ino, huh? i dont blame you. if only she was legal-

**TroublesomeShika: **NO! i need you to keep sasuke busy tomorrow so that kiba and naruto can have a day alone without the uchiha buting in.

**PervertedStalker: **oh, so your helping out kiba getting naruto huh? well, i have al lte best intentions for my student, BUT ill help. ill keep sasuke doing something. hmm. that might be alittle hard, but ea, i can do it.

**TroublesomeShika: **good. with sasuke busy, kiba will be free to woo the dumb blonde we call naruto. now what will he do now...

Meh, if i ve spelling errors, try not to jump on me about it. lol. well, hope you liked this chapter, and remember: reading is nice, and reviewing is even nicer, but the nicest of all is me not having ino and sakura rape sasuke, so revirew!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol. but in truth, i loved the reviews i got so far (only 2. lol) so, get to it.


	5. Chapter 5

**_Meh. like i said before, im a bit lazy, but i am sorry that i havent made new chap in a while... just was too lazy. lol. meh. hope you still like my storys and stuff. and if you dont know, i dont own naruto... the things i could do with them if they belonged to me ... drool lol_**

****

**Ravenhair69: **Hmm. wy do i even bother to get on when noone else is on...

**_BlondeKitsune has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**BlondeKitsune:** Yoz sasuke-teme!

**Ravenhair69: **Hoe, how many times have i told you to NOT to call me that, naruto-baka!

**BlondeKitsune:** oy! how many times have i told you not to call me that!

**Ravenhair69: **last i remember, you didnt mind some of the names i called you.

**BlondeKitsune:** yea, but these hurt my feelings...

**_BlondeKitsune pouts_**

**Ravenhair69: **wow, didnt know we could do stuff like that...

**BlondeKitsune:** yea! i know! the old granny gave me some expresions on here, since we watches over the boards of konoha chat

**Ravenhair69: **coo. what else she tell you?

**BlondeKitsune:** well...

**_BlondeKitsune sticks tounge at _Ravenhair69**

**_BlondeKitsune blushes _**

**_BlondeKitsune flips off _Ravenhair69**

**_BlondeKitsune winks at _Ravenhair69**

**_BlondeKitsune kicks _Ravenhair69**

**_BlondeKitsune ducks _**

**_Ravenhair69 dry humps BlondeKitsune_**

**BlondeKitsune:** woah, what was that?

**Ravenhair69: **meh. i found that one one day, and knew it would come in handy one day

**BlondeKitsune:** who would it come in handy with?

**Ravenhair69: **err... anyway, how good was last night?

**BlondeKitsune:** nope! im not going off the subject that quick! how long ago did you find that!

**Ravenhair69: **a while...

**BlondeKitsune:** and what is a while?

**Ravenhair69: **a while is a great amount of time that is really-

**BlondeKitsune:** BAKA! i know WHAT a while is, but i want to know how long was a while in your case!

**Ravenhair69: **err... think i hear my mother calling me

**BlondeKitsune:** TEME! you dont have a mother!

**Ravenhair69: **... oh yea- err, i mean, oh, that hurt! now im crying

**_Ravenhair69 crys (fake)_**

**BlondeKitsune:** dont even know how to real cry online...

**Ravenhair69: **so!

**BlondeKitsune:** so, im still smarter that you!

**Ravenhair69: **really?

**BlondeKitsune:** yea! computer wise!

**Ravenhair69: **riiiiiiiight...

**BlondeKitsune:** i am! i got a young adult degree while i was traveling!

**Ravenhair69: **right, sure, ok...

**BlondeKitsune:** meh. at least i know how to set up my web cam...

**Ravenhair69: **hey! who asked you!

**BlondeKitsune:** you did when you asked me about it p

**Ravenhair69: **you know what-

**BlondeKitsune:** dont be ashamed sasuke-teme, for once, im better than you at something! ha!

**Ravenhair69: **NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! NEVER!!!!!!!!

**BlondeKitsune:** hmmm. looks like our roles switched...

**Ravenhair69: **NOOOOO! NEVER BAKA!!!!! BAAAAAKAAAAA!!!

**BlondeKitsune:** hmm. i think your caps is stuck...

**Ravenhair69: **oh... my ... gosh... your right...

**BlondeKitsune:** yep. it happens. dont get too hung up on it..

**Ravenhair69: **noooo! im not a dumb blonde! i dont have retarded moments like you!

**BlondeKitsune:** sasuke, dont be over- wait, what?!

**Ravenhair69: **no, i must be losing it!

**BlondeKitsune:** wait, why does a blonde have to be stupid!

**Ravenhair69: **naruto... just dont make me go there...

**BlondeKitsune:** sasuke! dont make me come over and make you tell me!

**Ravenhair69: **riiight...

**BlondeKitsune:** i will!

**Ravenhair69: **well, theres only few ways people can make me talk of my own free will, and there are even fewer ways, so ha!

**BlondeKitsune:** your talking to the guy who holds your sex life in your hands...

**Ravenhair69: **... crap...

**BlondeKitsune:** yep. and i can hold out just as long as you can!

**Ravenhair69: **no you cant your just as HORNY as i am maybe, but you cant hold out longer

**BlondeKitsune:** fine! we'll see who can hold out the longest! sasuke! turn off your web cam already!

**Ravenhair69: **huh? its on? hmm. guess i can use it too good use...

**BlondeKitsune:** ?? sasuke, what are you doing?

**Ravenhair69: **what! NO! put back on your clothes!

**BlondeKitsune:** no, wait!!! stop stroking yourself... getting me... crap!!!!

**Ravenhair69: **so what do you say now naruto?

**BlondeKitsune:** grrrrr!!! so... horny...

**Ravenhair69: **yes, so why dont you come over to my place and we can help you out on that one

**BlondeKitsune:** but... no...

**Ravenhair69: **what? why put yourself threw all of this? why dont you just give in to me?

**BlondeKitsune:** because...

**Ravenhair69: **because?...

**_Ms. Uchiha has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_IchaLover has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Uchiha Wife has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_TroublesomeShika has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Pleasantly Plump has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_HeavySmoker has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Doggystyle101 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Hyuugaprincess2 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Bugpoker54 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Krazyeyez has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Youthful Green beast has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Chickwithknifes has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Freedestiny89 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Sexy green beast has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_PervertedStalker has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_BigBoobBlonde has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_StudentSlave has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_Bloodlover99 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_KonohaBrat11 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**_room blushes and/or faints_**

**Ravenhair69:**AHHHH!!!!

**BlondeKitsune:** cuz i phoned everyone and told them to come on, since it was a emergency. meh. guess they got the picture, if you get my drift. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

**Ravenhair69: **you evil blonde!

**BlondeKitsune:** im a ebil computer blonde p thats what you get for withholding sex from me teme!

**KonohaBrat11: **... why did you call me? im too young for this stuff

**PervertedStalker: **meh. never too young to learn i always say!

**BlondeKitsune:** ero-sennin...

**PervertedStalker:**no, super ero!!! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

**BigBoobBlonde:**yep, there becoming just alike

**Ms. Uchiha and Uchiha Wife: **SASUKE-KUN!!!!! WOOOOHOOOOO!!!

**_Ms. Uchiha and Uchiha Wife save pics of naked sasuke_**

**Ravenhair69: **NOOOOO!!! WAIT!!!!

**Uchiha Wife: **yay! now me and sakura have something for our fan club! yay!

**Ms. Uchiha: **yea, lets go print and post them around konoha ino!

**Uchiha Wife:**kay!

**_Ms. Uchiha has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

****

**_Uchiha Wife has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**Ravenhair69: **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

**BlondeKitsune:** hehehe

****

TO BE CONTINUED!

what will be the ending fate for sasuke and his nakedness? what will ino and sakura REALLY do with sasuke picture? what will be the reaction of some after they wake up from there sleep? what will ebil doers have to d with this? biggest questions: WHEN THE HECK DID NARUTO GET SMARTER AND WHO GAVE HIM A DEGREE, AND WHERE CAN I GET IT?!!! all aswers (maybe) will be answerd... NOW!! ... RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! meh. i need to get you to read more, so ill tell you later, but there will e some ebil ness (spelt like thaton purpose, amnd will see it spelt like that all over stories. lol)


	6. Chapter 6

_Meh. Yes, you got another out of me. Yea… lol. meh. Just to let you know, this is a bit off of what I was really going to start, but yea…. Meh. I got like 1300 hits. Yay! But the hits are not as important as the reply and comments. Hmmm. I should have sakura and ino rape sasuke…. Lol! Just kidding! Don't gang up on me and try to kill me. Lol. Well, for the people who did, I give props to:_

Shikamaru's Angel

bunnykitune

AngelzNDevilz

sprig

_So yea… meh. All I have to say is thanks. And yea, there will be other characters, like sand brats, orochimaru (acting super weird) and even a certain band of S-rank criminals MUHAHAHAHAHAH- coughcough AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! Lol. Well, now that we have that out of the way, lets get on with the story….. what did I promise you guys again? ………………. Was it sasuke getting rape by ino and sakura? Hmm…. Cant remember. Lol. I should go back to the last story….but im too lazy. ENJOY!_

* * *

**Ravenhair69: **Were was I? Oh yea, NOOOOOOOO!!!!!! I must go out and finds them! 

**BlondeKitsune: **Well, might want to go and find some clothes first of all sasuke…

**Ravenhair69: **Huh?oh yea, opps! Haha

**BlondeKitsune: **Yep, and that right there is all mine

**Sexy green beast: **NOOO!!! NEVER!!!!! SASUKE IS ALL MINE!!!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **……

**TroublesomeShika: **…….

**Bugpoker54: **…….

**Sexy green beast: **………..

**Youthful Green beast: **huh?

**BlondeKitsune: **What did he just type?

**Sexy green beast: **Urr……. Nothing….. hand sliped…. Gottogo

****

Sexy green beast has Logged off of Konoha Chat1

**Youthful Green beast: **Gai sensei, wait!!

**_Youthful Green beast has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**BlondeKitsune: **...wtf?

**TroublesomeShika: **yea, my words exactly

**TroublesomeShika: **looks like gai-sensei is trying to move in on narutos teritory...

**IchaLover: **yep

**Doggystyle101: **uh huh

**BlondeKitsune: **ye- WAIT, WHAT?! NOONE WILL STEAL AWAY SASUKE-TEME FROM ME!!!!!

**TroublesomeShika: **... anyway, like we were saying-

**BlondeKitsune: **DONT JUST WRITE ME OFF!!!!

**TroublesomeShika: **well, theres nothing we can do about it. gai gets what he wants when he wants it. well, all excepts kakashi-sensei. so he gave up on that and targeted his number one student

**IchaLover: **yep. makes sense

**Pleasantly Plump: **mmmmhmmm.

**Doggystyle101: **thats for sure

**KonohaBrat11: **yea, sasuke-kun number one

**BlondeKitsune: **yea, i guess that coud be- WAIT!!! IM NUMBER ONE STUDENT IN TEAM 7!!!!

**IchaLover: **more like 6th...

**TroublesomeShika: **but theres only 3 students, and one teacher...

**IchaLover: **yea, but even the imaginarly studnets are better than naruto

**BlondeKitsune: **WHAT?!!!!

**Doggystyle101: **yep. i agree

**BlondeKitsune: **KIBA!!! YOU KNOW WHAT? NO SOUP FOR YOU!

**Doggystyle101: **... soup?

**BlondeKitsune: **ERR... I MEAN RAMEN! NO RAMEN FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!

**Doggystyle101: **hmm... wait, NOO!!!! IM SORRY!!! PLZ LETS STILL GO OUT FOR RAMEN LATER!!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **NOO!!!!!! NEVER!!!!!! NOONE CALlS ME NUMBER 6 IN TEAM 7!!!!!

**Doggystyle101: **PLZ NARUTO!!!! ILL BE GOOD! PLZ!!!!!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! GO SUCK A LEMON!

**Doggystyle101: **I KNOW SOMETHING I CAN SUCK...

**TroublesomeShika: **first, you guys are morons for leaving your caps on for the while talk right there. second, ... yea... eww... soooooooo troublesome... even to type...

**Doggystyle101: **KISS MY ASS!!!!

**TroublesomeShika: **take OFF your caps baka!

**Doggystyle101: **ohh... sorry...

**TroublesomeShika: **see? troublesome...

**Doggystyle101: **yea, well, who asked you!

**TroublesomeShika: **i gave my opinion, which was aloud last time i checked...

**Doggystyle101: **well, noted and not wanted.

**TroublesomeShika: **well, if you dont want my opinion, kiba, then why did you come asking for my help to-

**Doggystyle101: **ERRRR!!!! WE LOVEZ YOUR OPINION! DONT SAY ANYTHING ILL ERR I MEAN YOULL REGRET!

**Bugpoker54: **... meh...

**Doggystyle101: **SHINO, WHY DO YOU EVEN GET ON IF ALL YOU DO IS POST DOTS!! MAYBE YOU SHOULD JUST GO OFF LINE!!!!

_**Bugpoker54 ******** has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

**Doggystyle101: **hmmm. now i want a million yen...

**Pleasantly Plump: **hmmm. maybe he was hurt?

**Doggystyle101: **maybe you ate him?

**TroublesomeShika: **kiba? why dont you go away since your bothing everyone

_**Doggystyle101******** has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

**TroublesomeShika: **hmm. shino's one thing, but kiba usually yells at people, not take it up the ass and run away...

**Pleasantly Plump: **yep...

_**Pleasantly Plump **__******has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

**TroublesomeShika: **chouji?

**BigBoobBlonde: **hmmm? whats happening?

**TroublesomeShika: **err... 3 people just logged off for some reason in just a minute

**IchaLover: **... well, i wouldnt say its all that important...

**TroublesomeShika: **ey, all im saying is that its trobleso-

_**TroublesomeShika ****has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

**IchaLover: **???? didnt even finish the "me" part of "troublesome" ... maybe something is wro-

_**IchaLover ****has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

**_HeavySmoker has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**_Hyuugaprincess2 has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**_Bugpoker54 has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**_Krazyeyez has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**_Chickwithknifes has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**_Freedestiny89 has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**_PervertedStalker has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**_BigBoobBlonde has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**_StudentSlave has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**_Bloodlover99 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1_**

**BlondeKitsune: **???? wtf? who could have done this? why am i left on all by my self?

_**UNKNOWNUSER1: **_because i arranged it naruto.

**BlondeKitsune: **??? you are??????

_**UNKNOWNUSER1: **_dont worry. ill make my self known to you soon, just worry more about your boytoy. form what i remember, hes in for... a pain in the butt. no pun intended.

**BlondeKitsune:** huh?????

_**UNKNOWNUSER1: **_youll get it in the next chapter...

**BlondeKitsune: **next chapter?

_**UNKNOWNUSER1: **_err... uhh... just know that you tan body will be mine. from your bright yellow hair to your wonderful perfect toes! ... BYE!

_**UNKNOWN LOG OFF**_

**BlondeKitsune: **WAIT! WHO ARE YOU BAKA!!!!

**KonohaBrat11: **... why didnt i get logged off too?

**BlondeKitsune: **konohamaru?

**KonohaBrat11: **yep. looks like he forgot me

**BlondeKitsune: **hmm. wonder why...

**BlondeKitsune: **maybe he just forgot about you... since your soooooo small...

**KonohaBrat11: **WHAT?!! YOU MAY BE MY OLDER BRO, BUT I CAN STILL TAKE YOU NOODLE 4 BRAINS!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **WHAT?!!! NOONE BAD MOUTHS RAMEN LIKE THAT!!

**KonohaBrat11: **BAAAAAAKAAAAAAA!!! YOU JUST MADE FUN OF YOURSELF!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **... i did?

**KonohaBrat11: **... hopeless, aint you?

**KonohaBrat11: **damn your clueless 24/7...

**BlondeKitsune: **EY! I RESENT THAT

**KonohaBrat11: **then what were we just talking about?

**BlondeKitsune: **... ramen?

**KonohaBrat11: **... again, damn...

**BlondeKitsune: **BAKA KID!

**KonohaBrat11: **BAKA BLONDE!!

**BlondeKitsune: **... this is getting us no where!

**KonohaBrat11: **yep. we both know your an idiot, but who was that guy and how did he make everyone disapper?

**BlondeKitsune: **yep. thats true. i wond- EY!

**KonohaBrat11: **meh. could be anyone.

**BlondeKitsune: **i know. even me...

**KonohaBrat11: **... wow, dude... is it even possable?

**KonohaBrat11: **and he said something about sasuke butt being in trouble...

**BlondeKitsune: **NOONE SCREWS SASUKE BUT ME!!!

**KonohaBrat11: **... your the uke from what i hear...

**BlondeKitsune: **uke?

**KonohaBrat11: **your bottom. you take it. your the catcher. you the bitch. you screams sasukes name like a bitch. you-

**BlondeKitsune: **OK! I GET THE IDEA!

**KonohaBrat11: **meh. just making you learn something...

**BlondeKitsune: **but how did it get around... to the point were you even hear it?

**KonohaBrat11: **meh. ive got my secret informents...

**BlondeKitsune: **who?

**KonohaBrat11: **IF I TOLD YOU THERE NOT SECRET ANYMORE, ARE THEY?!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **WELL HOW WOULD I KNOW!!!!!

**KonohaBrat11: **BAKA!!!! ITS SAID SO IN THE WORD "SE-CR-RT" "BA-KA!!!!!!!!"

**BlondeKitsune: **YES IT IS!!!!!!

**KonohaBrat11: **ITS PAINFUL TO SEE HOW IDIOTIC YOU CAN BE!!!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **WHAT? YOU WANNA GO BRAT?!!!

**KonohaBrat11: **LETS GO THEN BAKA BRAINS!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **TALK IS CHEAP!

**KonohaBrat11: **BUT THEN AGAIN, SO ARE YOU!

**BlondeKitsune: **WHAT?!!!

**KonohaBrat11: **YEA! WITH YOU AND YOUR UKENESS!

**BlondeKitsune: **WHO TOLD YOU I WAS A UKE?!

**KonohaBrat11: **YOUR THE DUMBASS, SO I GUESSED!

**BlondeKitsune: **IM SEME, DAMMIT!

**KonohaBrat11: **YEA RIGHT!

**BlondeKitsune: **I AM! SASUKE IS MY BITCH!

**Ravenhair69: **i hear its the other way around...

**BlondeKitsune: **WHAT!!!

**Ravenhair69: **you are my uke baka

**BlondeKitsune: **SASUKE-TEME!

**Ravenhair69: **and why the hell you do both always have your CAPS on anyway? fighting like little kids, and i only remember one of you being a kid...

**KonohaBrat11: **... meh. **  
**

**BlondeKitsune: **????? i dont get it...

**Ravenhair69: **sigh whatever. anyway, i was able to catch up with sakura and ino. i could have had your help mind you, but i think i got all the flyers and i burned them. too bad they still have more somewhere, and i couldnt make them talk. even tryed a genjutsu, but that was a nogo. freakin sakura and her knowledge...

**BlondeKitsune: **hmm. wonder if i could buy some of those pics...

**Ravenhair69: **what?!

**BlondeKitsune: **hehehe.

**Ravenhair69: **see, next time i see you im going to jump you and beat you ass so hard, youll beg me to both stop and go harder!

**BlondeKitsune: **what? didnt i say i was the seme!

**KonohaBrat11: **ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke ukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeukeuke!!!!!!!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **ey im seme!

**Ravenhair69: **dont remember you hating being uke last time. and i think you got off on being tied up too.

**KonohaBrat11: **baka-bro likes S&M?

**Ravenhair69: **trust me, it goes a LOT further than that. hehehehe

**BlondeKitsune: **ey!!

**KonohaBrat11: **hmm. i think i have some handcuffs somewhere in my room. could let you borrow...

**Ravenhair69: **hmm. naw. naruto has soft wrist, so i use silk rokes, so that his wrist arent hurt

**KonohaBrat11: **no, but i have the fuzzy kind that are soft you the touch and wont leave you marks or rope burn, which ive seen on naruto a few times, and now it explains alot of things...

**BlondeKitsune: **EY! IM STILL HERE!

**KonohaBrat11: **so?

**Ravenhair69: **quiet slave. im making a deal here. keep quiet and i could get you some better bonds for your wrist.

**BlondeKitsune: **DAMN IT NOONE RESPECTS ME ANYMORE!!

**Ravenhair69: **you were in the first place?

**KonohaBrat11: **hmm. i think so... i cant remember...

**BlondeKitsune: **ey! thats it, im not seeing either one of you. you can just kiss away your big brother and your sex toy!

**Ravenhair69: **wait, lets not go too far now naruto...

**KonohaBrat11: **yea big bro! you know i respect you over all!

**Ravenhair69: **and your my only outlet nowadays...

**BlondeKitsune: **well, your just going to have to speak with your right hand about that, now wont you?

**KonohaBrat11: **wow, your rougher than i thought...

**BlondeKitsune: **thats the job of a seme!...

**Ravenhair69: **i would comment with my sex life wasnt on the line...

**BlondeKitsune: **better believe that!

**KonohaBrat11: **meh. better go now before its get more than PG-13...

**_KonohaBrat11 has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_ **

**Ravenhair69: **meh. the words between us arent meant for young eyes anyway

**BlondeKitsune: **what words? only person you have to talk to about your sex life is your right hand.

**Ravenhair69: **hmm. theres always sakura...

**BlondeKitsune: **ey!

**Ravenhair69: **please. like i would go with her. anyway, everyone knows that yoou cant hold out any longer than i can...

**BlondeKitsune: **hey! yes i can! i can last long without sex than you can!

**Ravenhair69: **ha! right! anyway, what happened to everyone, since i was off chasing the two bitches

**BlondeKitsune: **meh. somehow someone logged everyone off there chat by force. everyone but my and konohamaru, and...

**Ravenhair69: **and?

**BlondeKitsune: **and... and i dont want you to freak out, but... he said i would be his. in his exact words, he said something about me bring his, from my blond hair to my perfect toes..

**Ravenhair69: **???????!!!!!!!! WHAT! ILL KILL EM! WHO WAS IT! YOUR TOES ARE MINE AND MINE ALONE!

**BlondeKitsune: **...toe fetish?

**Ravenhair69: **just tell me who this was so i can go kill them

**BlondeKitsune: **thas the thing, it was an unknown user. there wasnt even a screen name. weird huh?

**Ravenhair69: **yea. ... dont worry, ill find out what this all means. rest asured that your toes are all mine!

**BlondeKitsune: **... ooooooookay...

**Ravenhair69: **so now that we've had time to clam down, how bout i come over?

**BlondeKitsune: **hmmm. how bout you come to your hand?

**_BlondeKitsune has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**Ravenhair69: **hmm. guess hes more butt hurt than i thought. meh. well just have sex with chocolate again and he'll forgive me in a second. besides that fact, whos moving in on my property? and why am i typing this?

_**UNKNOWNUSER2: **_dont worry, you while see soon, sasuke...

**Ravenhair69: **?? whos that?

_**UNKNOWNUSER2: **_dont worry about me. and dont worry about your toy. as i hear, someone has there eye on him, but remeber, i have my eye on you as well sasuke-kun. MUHAHAHA- coughcough -HAHAHA!!

_**UNKNOWN LOG OFF**_

**Ravenhair69: **?? okkkkk... i should cut down on the computer time...

_**Ravenhair69**** has Logged off of Konoha Chat1 **_

* * *

_woohoo! yay! i finished another one. meh. now go comment about it. lol. i liked this one. meh. now people come into view that are both trying to take away the couple, one for naruto and one for sasuke. if your some people, you may know whos who, but just incase you dont, it will end in a funny way. lol. now go review!_


	7. Chapter 7

_**Meh. sorry for not post since last year ; dont try shooting me, since im holding naruto as a hostage! ha! well, since ive been lazy, ill try to make up for it by posting 2-3 new pages today to make up for it lol. its good to know that some people still read this. lol. enjoy!****  
**_

* * *

**TroublesomeShika: **darn it, were the heck is he?

**Doggystyle101: **so you really seeked his help? he must wanted something in return.

**TroublesomeShika: **... too troublesome to mention or think of... 

**Doggystyle101: **??

**TroublesomeShika: **dont worry about it. that pervert will be here soon with his method on how to get you naruto

**Doggystyle101: **cant wait!!

**TroublesomeShika: **hmm. he said around this time...

_**PervertedStalker has logged on to Konoha Chat2**_

**Doggystyle101: **Bout time! 

**PervertedStalker: **yeayeayea...

**TroublesomeShika: **so lets hear it. how are we doing this 

**PervertedStalker: **with the help of... someone

**Doggystyle101: **and this someone is??

_**Uchihalover **__**has Logged on to Konoha Chat**__**2**_

**Doggystyle101: **??? who the heck is that? 

**TroublesomeShika: **may be naruto's new screen name...

**Doggystyle101: **no, its not naruto. naruto is busy

**TroublesomeShika: **then who are you

**Uchihalover: **kukukuku. maybe the pervert can tell you

**PervertedStalker: **that is orochimaru

**TroublesomeShika: **?????!!!

**Doggystyle101: **WHAT??!

**Uchihalover: **yes, its is i, the great ruler of ninjutsu, the immortal of the ninja world, the famous snake tamer, the man of a thousand faces, the-

**Doggystyle101: **wait, theres someone with the name "the man of a thousand faces" isnt it?

**TroublesomeShika: **yes, i believe there is

**Uchihalover: **... well, then in that case, i am... the man of steel!

**Doggystyle101: **nope. superman

**Uchihalover: **... the dark night?

**PervertedStalker: **batman. sorry

**Uchihalover: **.. i stand for truth, justice, and rightousness in the name of the moon!

**TroublesomeShika: **first, thats not you at all, and second, isnt that sailor moon?

**Uchihalover: **meh. its possable

**Uchihalover: **how about man above men?

**TroublesomeShika: **... i thought you were a women now...

**Uchihalover: **??????? how the hell would you get that??

**PervertedStalker: **well, if you look at the clues, you can see the hints

**TroublesomeShika: **yes, true...

**Doggystyle101: **... oh!!!! i got it!

**Uchihalover: **... i dont see it...

**TroublesomeShika: **well, yea, your in deneyal...

**Uchihalover: **am not!

**TroublesomeShika: **are too

**Uchihalover: **am not!

**TroublesomeShika: **are too

**Uchihalover: **am not!

**TroublesomeShika: **are too

**Uchihalover: **am not!

**TroublesomeShika: **am not!

**Uchihalover: **are too and thats the LAST TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**TroublesomeShika: **... wow, cant believed that work...

**Doggystyle101: **yea...

**Uchihalover: **... that didnt! i did that on purpose! i did that too trick you all. im the master of- ... what was it?

**Doggystyle101: **Master of Disguise?

**Uchihalover: **YEA! that thingie...

**TroublesomeShika: **i think orochimaru is getting too old...

**Uchihalover: **MUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHEHEHEHEHEHECOUGCOUGH!!!

**TroublesomeShika: **...

**PervertedStalker: **...

**Doggystyle101: **... why did you bring him again old pervert?

**PervertedStalker: **err... it was to keep sasuke busy, but im starting to hate that idea now...

**Uchihalover: **HA! i will keep sasuke busy. i will have sasuke busy! i will make him mine while you have the kyuubi brat! MUHAHAHHAHA! he will be mine. i will-

**Doggystyle101: **... am i starting to see... naw...

**Uchihalover: **-and then i will whip over and over until he call me his master, and sasuke will be my bitch! MUHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!

**TroublesomeShika: **... he must have stopped typing and talked to himself in mid sentence, and started typing to himself again later...

**Doggystyle101: **i really hope thats true...

**Uchihalover: **Anyway, lets get to the point! you call me here so that i can distract sasuke for you so that the dog boy can get with the stupid blonde, right?

**PervertedStalker:** right

**TroublesomeShika: **right

**Doggystyle101: **who you callin dog boy, snake he/she!?

**Uchihalover: **you dog breath, flea ridden brat!

**Doggystyle101: **you enjoy snakes invading your assho-

**Uchihalover: **GO SUCK A DOG BISKET!

**Doggystyle101: **GO SCREW UCHIHA!

**Uchihalover: **I WHICH ONE?!

**Doggystyle101: **?? uhhh... well... sasuke? who else?

**Uchihalover: **... noone...

**PervertedStalker: **besides uchia itachi?

**Uchihalover: **??!! how did you find out?!

**PervertedStalker: **i have my sources

**Doggystyle101: **you mean that s-rank criminal who destroyed the Uchia clan and who sasuke drives to kill?

**PervertedStalker: **yea, thats the one

**Doggystyle101: **you mean you two went together?

**Uchihalover: **well, somewhat. when we were in the Akatsuki together... well...

**PervertedStalker: **from what i heard, it was more one sided...

**Uchihalover: **well, what do you know!

**PervertedStalker: **that your not that attractive...

**Uchihalover: **U-G-L-Y YOU AINT GOT NO ALIBY, YOU UGLY!!!!!!!!

**Uchihalover: **YEA YEA! YOU UGLY, UH-HUH, YOU UGLY, UH-HUH

**Doggystyle101: **...

**TroublesomeShika: **sooooooooooooo... wat are you going to get sasuke to do?

**Uchihalover: **meh. might just kidnap him and have my way with him. what about you and naruto?

**Doggystyle101: **same thing most likely

**Uchihalover: **yep, thats the best

**Doggystyle101: **yep

**TroublesomeShika: **BAKAS!!

_**Medicalservent **__**has Logged on to Konoha Chat**__**2**_

**Medicalservent: **orochimaru-sama

**Uchihalover: **yes man-slave? 

**TroublesomeShika: **man slave??

**PervertedStalker: **its kabuto...

**Doggystyle101: **ahh, that makes more sense

**Medicalservent: **sama, your bath water is ready. i have perpared the warm water, pink bubbles, rubber ducky, toy ships, picture of sasuke-kun while his sleeping in the nude, and other stuff ready for you

**Uchihalover: **ok, no prob. ill get to it in a minute kabuto

**Medicalservent: **yes orochimaru-sama

_**Medicalservent has logged off of Konoha Chat2**_

**PervertedStalker: **... 

**TroublesomeShika: **uhh... think this was a waste of time...

**Doggystyle101: **yea...

**TroublesomeShika: **not to mention that we have to deal wth micheal jackson here

**PervertedStalker: **yea, the simularities are great

**Doggystyle101: **yep

**Uchihalover: **... whos micheal jackson?

**TroublesomeShika: **a petifile

**Uchihalover: **ahh

**Doggystyle101: **...

**TroublesomeShika: **...

**Uchihalover: **...

**PervertedStalker: **...

**Uchihalover: **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

**Uchihalover: **cant have that go on my record!!!! I MUST FLEE!!!!! KABUTO, GATHER MY SEX TOYS!!!!!!!!!

_**Uchihalover has logged off to konoha chat2**_

**Doggystyle101: **So, does anyone wonder how orchimaru and his man slave got on to this chat? it only allows konoha members to get on. 

**PervertedStalker: **well, kabuto is pretty smart, so i wouldnt put it past him to hack into the konoha main frame.

**Doggystyle101: **Then that means alot of people could get into konoha chat just by hacking in?

**PervertedStalker: **yep. the hokage should be awared of this. Sorry that ive got no ideas on gaining narutos love. my best interest is out for him really. sasuke reminds me too much of orochimaru, so it would be best to break them up, and i think dog boy will be the best fit to do it

**Doggystyle101: **EY! DONT CALL ME THAT ERO-BAKA!

**PervertedStalker: **meh. just be careful. i love that boy like a son, so dont screw him over, or else... damn, wish i had somehting to go with that...

_**PervertedStalker has logged off to konoha chat2**_

**Doggystyle101: **Hmm. thats the first time ive seen someone care so much for naurto besides sasuke. 

**TroublesomeShika: **Meh. Troublesome. ive got to get going too. mom keeps bitching at me to get off the computer...

_**TroublesomeShika has logged off to konoha chat2**_

**Doggystyle101: **Damn! how will i get naurto! 

**UNKNOWNUSER1:** you wont be doing that in afraid

**Doggystyle101: **huh? whos that? have you been listening all that time?!

**UNKNOWNUSER1:**ha. what a boring conversation. like i care that you have a little crush over the blonde. in the end, he shall be mine, and he will be on his knees before me, doing more than worshiping my feet! MUHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! now if you excuse me, i have to go to the hidden village of rain to pick up my sharingan rouge nail polish. excuse me. and please open the mail ive sent to you young one. goodbye

_**UNKNOWNUSER1 has logged off to konoha chat2**_

**Doggystyle101: **hmm? lets see... crap! its a virus! my computer is shuting dow- 

_**Doggystyle101 has logged off to konoha chat2**_

* * *

_**a bit short, may, but thats all i could think of without giving away future plans (yes, i have evil plans for the futrue1 MUAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!! lol) but look out! i will tell you one thing, a few people are getting some "suprize" gifts in the near future. yay! love gifts, no? (not for you though. lol) **_


	8. Chapter 8

**Well, heres another one. second of the three im posting in a row to make up for not posting since last year. haha. here we go!**

* * *

**BlondeKitsune: **yes! 

**Ravenhair69: **no!

**BlondeKitsune: **yes!!

**Ravenhair69: **no!!

**BlondeKitsune: **YES!!!

**Ravenhair69: **NO!!!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **i say yes!!!

**Ravenhair69: **i say hell no!!! N-O! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **no fair.

_**KonohaBrat11 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1**_

**Ravenhair69: **too bad.

**BlondeKitsune: **well, too bad for you because i say yes!

**Ravenhair69: **and i say no naruto!

**BlondeKitsune: **come on you bastard!

**Ravenhair69: **no your idoit!

**BlondeKitsune: **teme!

**Ravenhair69: **baka!

**BlondeKitsune: **well i say yes!

**KonohaBrat11: **???

**Ravenhair69: **no i say!

**BlondeKitsune: **its a yes

**Ravenhair69: **no

**BlondeKitsune: **yes

**Ravenhair69: **no

**BlondeKitsune: **yes

**Ravenhair69: **no

**BlondeKitsune: **yes!

**Ravenhair69: **yes!!

**BlondeKitsune: **NO! I SAID NO AND I MEAN NO! RESPECT MY FUCKIN ATHORA-TAY!!!

**KonohaBrat11: **hmm. thought that only worked in cartoons...

**BlondeKitsune: **teme tricked me!

**Ravenhair69: **well, it came from your own lips, there will be no anniversary

**KonohaBrat11: **anniversary?

**BlondeKitsune: **yea! two days from now it will be a year since me and sasuke have been together! and i want to have an anniversary but sasuke-teme dont want to hold it. such a stick in the mud...

**Ravenhair69: **i am not! and just because i dont want to spend my valuable time on some mushy gushy anniversary im a stick in the mud? man, i thought one of the perks of dating a guy would be avoiding all the girly crap... but then again, look who im talking about...

**BlondeKitsune: **grrrrr

**KonohaBrat11: **_sigh_ you guys are TOO weird. the only couple i know who fight like you do but make up like you do...

**BlondeKitsune: **just because were a couple doesnt mean were not still rivals!

**Ravenhair69: **Hm.

**KonohaBrat11: **i think you two are fit for each other

**Ravenhair69 and ****BlondeKitsune**: IN WHAT WAY?!

**KonohaBrat11: **so alike you dont even know it...

**BlondeKitsune: **ANYWAY, sasuke, we should atleast have a 1 year anniversary. how bout we have one every five years so that you dont have to go out of the way every year!

**Ravenhair69: **meh. fine. but dont hold me responsable for remembering such a think. next think you know you would want to have an anniversary for the first cup of ramen we shared together...

**BlondeKitsune: **thats two weeks from now! mark it on your calander!

**Ravenhair69: **man, wi sure can pick 'em...

**BlondeKitsune: **yay! now i have to buy something for you, buy some more nice clothes-

**Ravenhair69: **you only wear one thing...

**BlondeKitsune: **so! i can wear somehting diffrenent!

**Ravenhair69: **but knowing you, you would forget until the last minute, throw something on, pick some flowers from your window, and then open the door to show me, holding a kickass present and in good clothes

**BlondeKitsune: **wow, you know me so well sasuke!

**Ravenhair69: **not really. i dont understand the minds of idoits

**BlondeKitsune: **you bastard!

**Ravenhair69: **mega-baka!

**BlondeKitsune: **ultra-teme!

**KonohaBrat11: **SHUT-UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **!?

**Ravenhair69: **!?

**KonohaBrat11: **will you two just shutup and prepare for your date in two days!! and naruto, ramen isnt a good gift for sasuke, but ramen is the perfect gift for naruto, sasuke!

**Ravenhair69: **... meh

**BlondeKitsune: **... damn...

**KonohaBrat11: **man you two are really a pain in the ass. and they call me a brat...

**Ravenhair69 and ****BlondeKitsune: **YOU ARE, BRAT!

**KonohaBrat11: **GO TO HELL, BOTH OF YOU!!

**Ravenhair69: **man, this boyfriend thing is tiresome.

**BlondeKitsune: **tell me about it. now i have to think what the famous uchiha wants...

**Ravenhair69: **and i got to pick out something that not ramen...

**BlondeKitsune: **WHAT?! NO RAMEN?!

**Ravenhair69: **nope. getting you real present. something that thoughtful

**BlondeKitsune: **ramen is thoughtful...

**Ravenhair69: **ramen is just flavored noodles...

**BlondeKitsune: **WHAT?! BOYFRIEND OR NOT, NOONE BAD MOUTHS MY FIRST LOVE, RAMEN!!!!!

**KonohaBrat11: **...

**Ravenhair69: **...

**KonohaBrat11: **man, i thought bro was brain dead before...

**Ravenhair69: **meh. seems like he gets stupider with every pasting second...

**KonohaBrat11: **then what keeps you going back to him?

**Ravenhair69: **his body. to think of all the things i can do to him... _drools_

**KonohaBrat11: **...ewwwww...

**Ravenhair69: **i can remember this one time that me and him were in the middle of a mission in lightning country. we found a nice quiet part of the forest, and I began to screw-

**KonohaBrat11: **STOP! IM TOO YOUNG FOR THIS CRAP DAMNIT!!!

**_KonohaBrat11 has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**BlondeKitsune: **hmm looks like he couldnt take it...

**Ravenhair69: **you almost couldnt either from what i remember. hehe

**BlondeKitsune: **baaaaaaaaka!

**Ravenhair69: **hmm...

**BlondeKitsune: **?? whats wrong. you would have given me a smart ass responce by now...

**Ravenhair69: **from what i remember, your the one with the smart ass... and what an ass...

**BlondeKitsune: **...

**Ravenhair69: **but what i was thinking about was... your last boyfriend...

**BlondeKitsune: **?? thought you said never talk about him again...

**Ravenhair69: **but around the time you broke up, we got together. tomorrow i do believe

**BlondeKitsune: **yea. it would have been 3 months tomorrow...

**Ravenhair69: **yea...

**BlondeKitsune: **...

**Ravenhair69: **...

**BlondeKitsune: **is it ok to talk about this yet?

**Ravenhair69: **i guess. as long as its only me, and never him, and you swear to kill a bunny ever time you hear his name.

**BlondeKitsune: **i swear. im glad you dont say it often...

**Ravenhair69: **yea, i dont think i could bear saying his name anyway...

**BlondeKitsune: **how bout i treat you to some... COOKIES!!

**Ravenhair69: **no...must,,,,,,,deny...secret...pleasure...

**BlondeKitsune: **so thats a no?

**Ravenhair69: **... meh. ill think about it. man, im bored. wish something would happen

**BlondeKitsune: **well, what do you think will happen? someone will hack there way onto konoha forums and start trouble?

_**KONOHA FIREWALL: DOWN**_

**Ravenhair69: **???

**BlondeKitsune: **??? huh

_**SandChibi has Logged on to Konoha Chat1**_

_**Puppet-Master has Logged on to Konoha Chat1**_

_**WindFangirl52 has Logged on to Konoha Chat1**_

**WindFangirl52: **yay! we hacked our way on!

**BlondeKitsune: **wha? who are you?

**SandChibi: **baka uchiha, looks like your not all that knowing after all, huh?

**Ravenhair69: **you son of a-

**Puppet-Master: **clam down red eyes. we only came here because we were bored

**BlondeKitsune: **well, same here

**Ravenhair69: **WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE!!

**WindFangirl52: **guess.

**BlondeKitsune: **is it Temari, Gaara of the Desert, and Kankuro?

**WindFangirl52: **...noooooooooooooooooooo...

**Ravenhair69: **wha? is it possable for that idiot to get something right

**SandChibi: **dont call him an idoit, or ill put you out of the pain of being one of the few remaining uchiha's.

**Ravenhair69: **i gather that is gaara. and ill put you out of the pain of being the creepyest guy ever!

**SandChibi: **you leaf-eater

**Ravenhair69: **you sand-choker!

**SandChibi: **red eyes!

**Ravenhair69: **no brows!

**SandChibi: **curse seal necked dumass

**Ravenhair69: **'love' tattoo headed freak!

**BlondeKitsune: **err, why are you fighting

**SandChibi and ****Ravenhair69: **STAY OUT OF THIS!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **uhh... ok... ill just go hide in the corner...

**SandChibi: **dont go hiding in the corner my love, you look better in the light. that sad excuse of a shinobi uchiha sasuke should be in the shadows, away from you, and where you and me can be together forever!

**Ravenhair69: **i swear i should just bomb the hell out of your place...

**SandChibi: **how bout i destory the konoha village. ive almost done it once, so dont make me finish the job!

**Ravenhair69: **bring it sand boy!

**SandChibi: **go burn yourself!

**Ravenhair69: **go build a sand castle!

**SandChibi: **i already did. it was, like, really, really, REALLY big, but kankuro knocked it down, so i made him-...never mind...

**BlondeKitsune: **what? WHAT?!

**SandChibi: **_coughcoughchokecoughoncoughsandcoughcough_

**Puppet-Master:** embarrising...

**Ravenhair69: **haha! choke on sand?! sand choker, sand choker, SAND CHOKER!!!!

**SandChibi: **dont make me murder you...

**Ravenhair69: **please, like you can do anything to me!

**SandChibi: **ill make you eat your parents

**Ravenhair69: **whatever

**Puppet-Master: **dude, hes done it before

**Ravenhair69: **... A.: you stole that from south park, B.: my parents are already dead, and C.: NO WAY MAN! AINT GOT THE BALLS!!!!

**SandChibi: **... i shall make you watch as i eat naruto... and yes i shall enjoy eating naruto

**Ravenhair69: **too late. hes been on my personal menu many times. that dish is only for me. sorry. hehehe

**SandChibi: **hmmm. ill give you Temrai. i hear shes a good meal for all from some relieable sources.

**Ravenhair69: **nope, ive gotten too use to the taste of naruto. sorry.

**SandChibi: **darn...

**WindFangirl52: **BAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

**SandChibi: **crap. temrai is running torward my room!!

**Ravenhair69: **hmm, now if he only turns on his webcam...

**SandChibi: **no! nooooooosD OIH vrvdt o kg-o-0im hae-0i gchnj yd f xx gdgt d nghm- ihtmht sgfc mhferrtyiok ...

**Puppet-Master: **wow, those are alot of shots to the keyboard...

**Ravenhair69: **he had it comming...

**BlondeKitsune: **how?

**Ravenhair69: **taking you away from me is a killable offense!

**BlondeKitsune: **... meh. graara is just trying to get closer to me. i know you are the only one for me teme.

**Ravenhair69: **Hm.

**Puppet-Master: **wow, you two are a jack up couple...

**Ravenhair69 and ****BlondeKitsune**so we're told.

**Puppet-Master: **... creepy...

**WindFangirl52: **sigh just got finished beating up graara. im soooooooo glad that after go to konoha he has become more of a pushover. hahah ;is isbxd p5 40p5m jt AHH!!!#H4rezarnhgreert HELPPPPPP!$kj4eginzsdsaofidgaw pdf apiaef awegawrgawrgawr hoi rhgarwhnjt ga42IKED9O3WRF 4JJ

**Puppet-Master: **graara! stop trying to kill temari!!

**WindFangirl52: **NOOOOOO!ZY4y hy6vs oetsmh estmszret sehra er r HEL-

_**WindFangirl52 has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

**Puppet-Master: **crap. her computer is broke. better go put a stop to this before i only have 1 instead of 2 siblings buhbye!

_**Puppet-Master has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

**BlondeKitsune: **hmm. too bad for her...

**Ravenhair69: **yep...

**BlondeKitsune: **anyway! lets take about our anniversiry!

**Ravenhair69: **rather talk about how next time i see you im going to-

**SandChibi: **give him to me?

**BlondeKitsune: **wha?? graara your still on?

**SandChibi: **yea. i just threw my siblings out the window.

**BlondeKitsune: **...

**SandChibi: **... joke...

**BlondeKitsune: **... you know, your so serious most of the time its hard to tell if your joking or not...

**Ravenhair69: **not to mention your ugly...

**SandChibi: **...i WILL kill you...

**Ravenhair69: **bring it on, sand boy

**SandChibi: **Oh! concider it brung, fire boy

**BlondeKitsune: **next thing you know you two will start doing cheers...

**SandChibi: **_slide! slide!  
and do the butterfly!  
Go! Go!  
Everybody on there toe's!_

**Ravenhair69: **_Hey Hey  
You get out of my way  
Today is the day  
Im gonna put you away!_

**BlondeKitsune: **oy...

**SandChibi: **_You might be good at Ninjutsu,  
and that might just be a fact,  
but when it comes to naruto's love,  
You might as well step back  
you might as well step back!_

**Ravenhair69: **_Ashes to ashes, dust to dust  
hate to beat you, but I must  
when you're up, you're up  
when you're down, you're down  
when you're messing with the naruto  
Im gonna slap you up side down  
up side down!_

**BlondeKitsune: **so crappy...

**SandChibi: **_Do I really rock?  
Yeah, Yeah  
Do I take it to the top?  
Yeah, Yeah  
Am i ever gonna stop?  
No way!_

**Ravenhair69: **_I'm number 1,  
Not number 2!  
And I'm gonna beat the,  
"Whoops" out of you!_

**BlondeKitsune: **will you stop the cheers already!!!

**SandChibi: **then you do one!

**Ravenhair69: **yea, if you think your so good!

**BlondeKitsune: **uhhhhh...  
_They've got our ball(clap,clap),  
We want it back(clap,clap)  
They've got our ball(clap,clap),  
We want it back(clap,clap)  
They've got our ball(clap,clap),  
We want it back!(clap,clap)_

**SandChibi: **and you call ours crappy...

**Ravenhair69: **come on, you can think of a better one...

**BlondeKitsune: **I can't

**Ravenhair69: **Why not?

**BlondeKitsune: **I can't!

**Ravenhair69: **Why not?!

**BlondeKitsune: **_Cuz my back aches, my skirts too tight, my hips shake from left to right.  
To the left, to the right, to the left and to the right!_

**BlondeKitsune: **ha! hows that?!

**SandChibi: **yay! go naruto!

**Ravenhair69: **go baka!!

**BlondeKitsune: **thought so- ey! sasuke-teme!!

**SandChibi: **I must go now. bye my love. ... burn in hell uchiha

_**SandChibi has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

**Ravenhair69: **grrr... i hate him...

**BlondeKitsune: **sasuke clam down. you shouldnt be so angry. you are the one and only guy for me

**Ravenhair69: **Hn.

**BlondeKitsune: **now, about our anni-

**Ravenhair69: **look at the time, ive got to go now! bye!

_**Ravenhair69 has Logged off of Konoha Chat1**_

**BlondeKitsune: **darn. now i cant tell him i want ramen... oh well. as long as i dont run into my old boyfriend today, it wont be a bad day...

**UNKNOWNUSER3:** now now my blonde, dont say such things. you will soon see that the love that i hold for you is still there, and i the love you hold for me is even greater than before.

**BlondeKitsune: **wait... it cant be...

**UNKNOWNUSER3:** yep. it is I, your "Ex." and i was here for the whole thing. i say we celebrate today. we been in love for the past 3 months, not to mention ive been in love with you longer, my sweet blonde, and i think thats worth some praise if i do say so myself.

**BlondeKitsune: **ok, how many times must i tell you that im in love with sasuke now. i wont go back to you and the way it used to be. not ever again

**UNKNOWNUSER3:** hey, everyone has there flaws. noones perfect, well, except for you. now we need to meet. how bout coming to my place tonight and we'll celebrate! Ill give you RAMEN.

**BlondeKitsune: **for the last time im not meeting you and we are never getting back together, no matter how much to try to bribe me fool! leave me and sasuke alone!

**_BlondeKitsune has Logged off of Konoha Chat1_**

**UNKNOWNUSER3:** ha! like that will happen. i will go for naruto till the end of time.

* * *

**Meh. wasnt my fav chapter to type but yea. Well, thats all i can type without giving away the ex. but either way, you wont guess who it is... mainly since i havent decided who it will be yet. lol. I didnt want any really "duh" choices like graara or anything. it has to be someone who wasnt introduced yet, but would have been with naruto in konoha for three months, and it cant be any Akatsuki, since ive got plans for them in the future. hehe. wouldnt shoot down any suggestions! someone give me an idea for the phsyco ex! and review. lol. same thing ;**


	9. Chapter 9

**the last one in a row! yay! meh. ill try posting one post once a week or something since im still on vacation for about one more month. more if im REALLY bored. lol. and remember, im still want opinions for narutos phsyco ex boyfriend. _NOTE: i did think of haku, but hes already dead, so i didnt want to make up some story for him still being alive. well... i will as a last resort(papa roach "last resort just came on. lol), but i want surprizing ideas..._ well, im blabbering on, so enjoy!**

* * *

_**StudentSlave has logged on to Konoha Chat1 **_

_**IchaLover has logged on to Konoha Chat1**_

**IchaLover: **oy naruto, are you online?

**StudentSlave: **...

**IchaLover: **dont look like anyones online.

**StudentSlave: **ive got to ask the hokage to make a user key to show whos online...

**_StudentSlave and IchaLover have been moved to Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat_**

**IchaLover: **What the?

**StudentSlave: **yea, how did we get here...

**BigBoobBlonde: **i moved you two here. thought it would be easyer really...

**StudentSlave: **hokage-sama, why do you have that as your screen name anyway...

**PervertedStalker: **because i made it her screen name. hehehehe

**StudentSlave: **Sannin-sama!

**IchaLover: **nice choice J.

**PervertedStalker: **i know

**BigBoobBlonde: **meh. havent got around to changing it. anyway, i could view your chat from here, and just to tell you, i have invented a key for this chat, just recently, so i guess i can tell you how to access it.

**StudentSlave: **cool

**IchaLover: **yea

**BigBoobBlonde: **yep. after all the unknown users and the hacking going on, its good to know whos on.

**PervertedStalker: **all you have to do is press Alt+F4 and a new window will apper.

**StudentSlave: **kay!

_**StudentSlave has logged off of Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat **_

**PervertedStalker: **HAHAHAHAHAHHA! he brought it!

**IchaLover: **meh. too bad i didnt. now Tsunade, what is the real thing?

**BigBoobBlonde: **press Ctrl+Alt+K and a screen will show up wanting a password. its hidden. then a new screen will show you the key to all chats. i need to get around to giving power to certain people... well, for th most part, im only giving jounnin and up this information, so when you slave get back on, dont tell him how to use it.

**IchaLover: **meh. kay hmm. better bring him back since he cant log on this this chat himself

_**StudentSlave has been moved to Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat **_

**StudentSlave: **Jiraiya-sama tricked me!!!

**IchaLover: **meh. it was too easy.

**StudentSlave: **who side on you on...

**IchaLover: **yours. thats why im helping you look for naruto.

**BigBoobBlonde: **Hmm? your looking for naurto?

**StudentSlave: **yes. we need to talk with his about his relationship with him and sasuke. we are worried-

**PervertedStalker: **-that sasuke is screwing him threw the mattress?

**IchaLover: **yep

**StudentSlave: **kakashi!

**BigBoobBlonde: **meh. its not a secret they screw, really.

**StudentSlave: **either way me and kakashi need to speak with him to talk discuss the matter. hes like our son

**IchaLover: **yea, Iruka is like the overprotective mother and im the tough father

**PervertedStalker: **... uhhh... thats me and the old lady here.

**BigBoobBlonde: **yep!

**IchaLover: **huh?

**PervertedStalker: **im like the boys father, and old lady watches over him not only as the hokage, but as a mother

**StudentSlave: **but me and kakashi have been there for naruto for the very start of his ninja life. you two appered later in his life.

**IchaLover: **yes, ive taught naruto the fundimentals of teamwork and ninja life

**PervertedStalker: **and ive taught him about the world and how he need to protect himself from evil

**StudentSlave: **i was naruto teach first really...

**PervertedStalker**** and ****IchaLover**and he was a dunce!!

**StudentSlave: **well, ive cared for naurto and given him advice and been his rail when he needed something to steady himself

**BigBoobBlonde: **and ive push naurto torwards his dreams and set a example of what a hokage should do to protect there village with all there spirt.

**IchaLover: **hmm. so i wonder... who does naruto see as his mother and father.

**PervertedStalker: **well, none the less, your his teacher Kakashi

**IchaLover: **well, so are you Jiraiya

**BigBoobBlonde: **i naturally look over him as a hokage, so why wouldnt i look over him as a mother. not to mention im an actual girl...

**StudentSlave: **well i am a mother figure in naruto's life!

**BigBoobBlonde: **well once you grow tits and lose the cock, then you can start a fight!

**IchaLover: **but i do say that i rather like the cock though...

**PervertedStalker: **you two are a couple?

**BigBoobBlonde: **wow, youve just figured this out?

**PervertedStalker: **hmmm. thought he was still with that one ANBU... yamoto was it?

**BigBoobBlonde: **urr... thinking you stepped on a land mind you dumbass.

**PervertedStalker: **opps. sorry.

**IchaLover: **meh. dont worry bout it. were not totally over that subject as of late...

**StudentSlave: **...hes still in love with you...

**IchaLover: **but I'M love YOU.

**StudentSlave: **... love?

**IchaLover: **yep.

**StudentSlave: **wow... first time ive heared you say-err, type that...

**IchaLover: **yea, and i dont say it unless i mean it... baka...

**BigBoobBlonde: **heh. you two remind me of sasuke and naurto...

**StudentSlave: **oh yea, back to the original fight!! naurto is our son!

**BigBoobBlonde: **dope! your really like naurto. you dont let a fight go easy. your man just said he loved you.

**StudentSlave: **oh yea...

**IchaLover: **yep. his pure, idoit, soul is what i love most of all... that and the way he is in bed...

**StudentSlave: **kakashi!

**PervertedStalker: **hmm. maybe bigboobs and me should give it a try. been friends since children, so-

**BigBoobBlonde: **-so the idea of us even having more then a bareable friendship would force me to break every bone in your body, mend them until your fully healed, then do it again and again, and again until it not all that funny anymore and i just do it for sport, but by then i would let you atleast try to fight back, but we both know that i would beat you to the inch of your life each and everytime, so if ever again you think that anything could happen between us, thinkk about the fact of me breaking your dick in half, then reparing it, and breaking it again, then i would cut it off, but make sure its still an active organ so that you could feel any pain that befalls it, even though its sepreated from your body. and trust me that you will not enjoy this kind of treat me to your ... "little friend" and ill take those words quite literal in your case since ive seen you naked before.

**PervertedStalker: **...dude...

**BigBoobBlonde: **errr... anyway... heh heh... how bout that weather!

**PervertedStalker: **...ouch...

**IchaLover: **so... what now?

_**Closetpervert has logged on to Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat**_

**StudentSlave: **whos that??

**BigBoobBlonde: **its ebisu

**Closetpervert: **yoz!

**PervertedStalker: **wha? hes a closet pervert?

**Closetpervert: **what?! no!

**StudentSlave: **then why is it your screen name...

**Closetpervert: **err... uhh...

**IchaLover: **hmm. i heared naurto saying something about that.

**Closetpervert: **that damned brat...

**PervertedStalker: **so it is true

**Closetpervert: **NOOOOOOOO!!!! NEVER!!!!!

**BigBoobBlonde: **dont be so dramatic over it ebisu-pervert

**Closetpervert: **not you too hokage-sama!

**BigBoobBlonde: **because its fun to torture you with a name given to you. hehe.

**Closetpervert: **no respect...

**IchaLover: **so ebisu is a admin?

**BigBoobBlonde: **yep. gave him the power since he was the old mans elite

**Closetpervert: **hahahahahaha!!! losers!!!!!

**PervertedStalker: **kakashi can still kick your ass...

**Closetpervert: **ha! yea right!

**BigBoobBlonde: **hmmm. i wonder which wonder is more perverted

**PervertedStalker: **well, kakashi only reads my books, icha icha(come come) series, which is one of the best sellers if i do say myself, and get perverted ideas from that root while ebisu is perverted original from his heart, and started reading my books after he found his pervert qualities.

**BigBoobBlonde: **well, in my view, there both pretty perverted

**StudentSlave: **yep. all the things kakashi does to me...

**BigBoobBlonde: **_sigh _i dont need to know your perverted acts Iruka...

**Closetpervert: **oh. my key is telling me my new... muse... has logged on. ill move her here if you dont mined hokage-sama

**BigBoobBlonde: **go for it

**IchaLover: **muse?

**StudentSlave: **whos your muse?

_**Bloodlover99 has been moved to Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat**_

**PervertedStalker: **Bloodlover99?

**IchaLover: **wait, isnt that

**Closetpervert: **Anko!

**Bloodlover99: **Ebisu!!

**BigBoobBlonde: **now we know hes a pervert...

**Closetpervert: **hey! just because me and anko are seeing each other, what makes that perverted?

**PervertedStalker: **err... have you check out her rack yet?

**IchaLover: **not to mention shes kinky

**StudentSlave: **kakashi!!

**IchaLover: **err... or so im told from asuma...

**Bloodlover99: **ASUMA??? MY LOVE?!?!?! WHERE?!!

**Closetpervert: **oy, shes still bent on him it seems...

**_BigBoobBlonde _**_**Death Glare at Bloodlover99**_

_**Bloodlover99 **_**_Death Glare at BigBoobBlonde_**

**Closetpervert: **well, it seems that theres a little grudge...

**BigBoobBlonde: **...Anko...

**Bloodlover99: **...Tsunade...

**PervertedStalker: **hmm. from what i remember, anko was orochimaru's old student, so they would know each other from way back woudnt they...

**IchaLover: **i guess so...

**Closetpervert: **battle of the chest!!

**PervertedStalker: **WOOHOOO!!!

_**BigBoobBlonde deathdrops Ebisu**_

_**Bloodlover99 Slices in half PervertedStalker**_

**IchaLover: **... glad im im into guys...

_**IchaLover is targeted**_

**IchaLover: **ERRRRR UHHHHH...

_**IchaLover Takes out a Bannana Suit**_

_ It's peanut butter jelly time! peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time  
Now Where he at, Where he at, Where he at, Where he at  
Now There he go, There he go, There he go, There he go  
Peanut butter jelly, Peanut butter jelly, Peanut butter jelly, Peanut butter jelly  
Do the peanut butter jelly, peanut butter jelly, Peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat  
Do the peanut butter jelly, peanut butter jelly, Peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat!_

**StudentSlave: **... what the hell was that...

**IchaLover: **well, look at the time, its about time i be going...

**StudentSlave: **wait! what about naurto!

**IchaLover: **huh? oh yea, that. meh. we should just go look for him. there is a world outside of the internet that hold people you know...

**StudentSlave: **yea... and he is on your team, so... wait. wy are we sooooooooooo stupid. we theres ramen, theres naurto, so all we have to do is-

**IchaLover: **-go to that freakin ramen bar and we can talk to naruto over ramen. that would ensure he wouldnt run away. well... not like he could run that far away from me anyway, but still...

**StudentSlave: **lets go kakashi! ill meet you there!

_**StudentSlave has logged off of Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat **_

_**IchaLover has logged off of Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat**_

**BigBoobBlonde: **hmm. seems like there going to try to teach naruto a lesson on love...

**PervertedStalker: **we should be there, since we are more parents to naurto then they are

**BigBoobBlonde: **right. lets go perv!

**PervertedStalker: **alright big old saggy boobs who age is really-

**BigBoobBlonde: **if you want to keep your status as a male, then youll stop when your ahead

_**BigBoobBlonde holds scapple to PervertedStalker "boys"**_

**PervertedStalker: **errr... yea, lets go!

_**BigBoobBlonde **__**has logged off of Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat**_

_**PervertedStalker**__**has logged off of Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat**_

**Closetpervert: **... no comment...

_**Bloodlover99: **_hmm. sounds like a good idea. you could stand to bleed somemore. wouldnt hurt to move tat curculation around! lets go to worry ebisu-pervert!

_**Bloodlover99 has logged off of Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat**_

**Closetpervert: **wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! no!!!!!!!!!!

_**Closetpervert has logged off of Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat **_

_**Sexy green beast has logged on to Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat**_

**Sexy green beast: **sasuke-kuuuuuuuunnn??!!! kakashi-kuuuuuuuuuun?!!! annnnnnnyyyyone heeeeerrrrrrreeeeee??!!!! damn. thought they would be on for sure... oh well. atleast i still have sasuke-kuns picture. hehehehehehehe. no to mention i took one of kakashi, naked. muahahhaahhahahahahahaha!!!! man, i even got it without the mask! hmm. i wonder why im typing all of this... who cares!!!!!!!!!! im coming sasuke!!!!!!! kakashi!!!!!!!!!!!!

_**Sexy green beast has logged off of Konoha Chat5: Admin Chat**_

**Weedplant007:** hmmm. looks like the hidden cloke worked extremely well. noone even knew i was here. **yea, it seems like it, huh.** Yea. we can inform the others that its safe to hold a meeting later on in the wee hours of the morning to ensure theres noone butting in. the Akatsuki will use the internet to the fullest!!

* * *

well, thats the end of this chapter. i find the chapter i make is getting... not funny. meh. oh weel, huh. oh yea, just so you know, the last message there at the end of this chapter, zetsu, i made two diffrent types of righting, but made it until the same person... well, since its one body. well, comment and look out for the next chapter. i might have the Akatsuki move... or i might write more on naurto and sasuke anniversiry. or... said too much already! just know, that "peanut butter jelly time" thing was REALLY random. hehe. comment! 


	10. Chapter 10

**_cries_** you like me! you really really like me (or my story, but same thing ) i can die happy! _**souls floats to heaven**_ WAIT! who will continue my story?! stop this soul train! (couldnt help it. lol)  
. but im really happy from all the response and all. thx to the reviews, i do have a few new ideas, so yay for you! well, since some people are like me, and dont want to read all of this, ill get on with it... after i mention that i dont think ive written a disclamer... hmm. maybe i own naruto? ha! then i would have the rewrites to the orginal story, im MANY ways. MUAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! but let me make it clear just for my self:

**I DO not own naruto and DO not own sasuke, or any other character of naruto. The series NARUTO IS **not** MINE AND MINE ALONE!!!! I have never claimed the anime NARUTO IS MY OWN creation and/or work, and most of all, I DOn't have naruto chained up in my basement, keeping a bowl of ramen just out of mouths reach, got it bub? now on with the story!**

* * *

**Ms. Uchiha: **ino you pig! 

**Uchiha Wife: **sakura you bitch!

**Ms. Uchiha: **slut!

**Uchiha Wife: **hoe!

**Ms. Uchiha: **trick!

**Uchiha Wife: **tramp!

**Ms. Uchiha: **ino, why dont you go rent your self out like you did with Kakashi, Jiraiya, Neji, Chouji, Kiba, Ebisu, Shino, hell, even orochimaru that one time!!!

**Uchiha Wife: **oh, and like you can talk, with you going down on lee evey other night!

**Ms. Uchiha: **ino, you even let the wierd dude from the sand that plays with dolls screw you, double penetration with him and his creepy dolls!!

_(you can VERY faintly hear "there puppets bitchies!!!!!!!!!!!!" in the direction of the hidden sand)_

**Uchiha Wife: **sakura, why do we still fight?

**Ms. Uchiha: **huh?

**Uchiha Wife: **we have to face the truth: naruto and sasuke are together now

**Ms. Uchiha: **yea, you have a point... no matter how hard we think, we cant help the fact that naruto is with sasuke now... damn, i hate blondes...

**Uchiha Wife: **hey!

**Ms. Uchiha: **NATURAL blondes, ino!

**Uchiha Wife: **oh... hehe. sorry...

**Ms. Uchiha: **by the way, what IS your real hair color, ino?

**Uchiha Wife: **well, ill tell as soon as you tell me yours. come on, who the hell grows pink hair?!

**Ms. Uchiha: **... ok, ill drop it...

**Uchiha Wife: **ok then!

**Ms. Uchiha: **ino... would it be wrong to kill naruto

**Uchiha Wife: **well, it depends. if its over sasuke, yes. if its anything else... hell, it's naruto so i say yes to either case!

**Ms. Uchiha: **hell yea!!

**Uchiha Wife: **hmmm. we could... set naruto on fire, and sasuke would lose any physical attration he had for the blonde boy.

**Ms. Uchiha: **wont work. ive seen him set of fire before, by me of course, but he always manages to put himself out before burning himself, the luck S.O.B.

**Uchiha Wife: **damn.

**Ms. Uchiha: **yea... we could tell sasuke naruto is a tranny.

**Uchiha Wife: **but hes not

**Ms. Uchiha: **ok, we could first TURN naruto into a tranny, then tell sasuke!

**Uchiha Wife: **how the hell are we going to turn him into a transexual granny?!

**Ms. Uchiha: **oh yea...

**Uchiha Wife: **yep.

**Ms. Uchiha: **... we could make him REALLY fat!

**Uchiha Wife: **not gonna work. have you seen how much ramen he puts away, and still keeps his figure. damn, it only he wasnt into guys and a load mouth-

**Ms. Uchiha: **ino! if you go over to the dark side, AKA anti-sasuke, you have to turn in your sasuke-holic Vice Presedint badge to me!

**Uchiha Wife: **NOOOOOOOOO!!!! ... we could pull down naruto pants in public and in front of sasuke to show he got a little dic-

**Ms. Uchiha: **not gonna work

**Uchiha Wife: **how do you know? we havent even tried it.

**Ms. Uchiha: **its just NOT going to work.

**Uchiha Wife: **only way you can say that is if you've seen him up close and per...-son...-al...wait, did you?

**Ms. Uchiha: **...yea...

**Uchiha Wife: **wha? when? how? why?!!!!

**Ms. Uchiha: **i saw him naked durning a simple item deliver mission to the lightning country. we had to stop for the night, naruto striped infront of the camp fire, and... well... wow... i didnt exactly yell for him to put his clothes on... well, neither did sasuke-kun... or kakashi-sensei... or the group of ninja who were going to attack us but fainted from the sight, who we found in the morning still kocked out.

**Uchiha Wife: **...damn dude!

**Ms. Uchiha: **well, just take my word for it, that plan wont work...

**Uchiha Wife: **... sakura, on the scale from really small to really big, is he-

**Ms. Uchiha: **he could beat a black man just with IT...

**Uchiha Wife: **hmmmm... we could always turn him. hehehehehehehe

**Ms. Uchiha: **ino, all you ever care about it being screw senseless, which really aint that far of a trip for YOU.

**Uchiha Wife: **you got dam-

**Ms. Uchiha: **wait, were fighting. we need to get sasuke and naruto to fight, not us

**Uchiha Wife: **yea, and split them up

**Ms. Uchiha: **hmmm. we need some kind of way to spilt those two up...

**Uchiha Wife: **well, i hear there anniversiry is coming tomorrow...

**Ms. Uchiha: **and what would be better than spliting them up tomorrow?!

**Uchiha Wife: **nothing!

**Ms. Uchiha and** **Uchiha Wife: ****MUHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA**!!!!!

**Ms. Uchiha: **_sigh_, wow, we suck.

**Uchiha Wife: **yeeeep.

**Ms. Uchiha: **anyway, we know when, but not HOW we're do this

**Uchiha Wife: **well, we could kill naruto

**Ms. Uchiha: **well then sasuke would morn for him forever, and it would take forever for one of us to catch him on the rebound.

**Uchiha Wife: **hmm. make a good point. looks like the big forehead actually holds a decent size brain.

**Ms. Uchiha: **yes, it doe- hey!

**Uchiha Wife: **well, how bout we... plant evidence of sasuke cheating on naruto!

**Ms. Uchiha: **no!!!!! sasuke would NEVER do that! has to be the other way around! that bitch naruto could break sasuke-kun's heart in a heartbeart... hehehehehe. expecally if sasuke thinks naruto went back to his old boyfriend!

**Uchiha Wife: **old boyfriend?

**Ms. Uchiha: **yea, about 3 months ago or something, naruto starting going out with this one guy... damn, what was his name...

**Uchiha Wife: **well, was he part of the leaf village?

**Ms. Uchiha: **i think so... hmm... damn it... what was his name!!!!

**Uchiha Wife: **think forhead, think!

**Ms. Uchiha: **your NOT helping!

**Uchiha Wife: **your NOT thinking! use that big ass brain of yours!!

**Ms. Uchiha: **you got damn bit- wait. i think i remember. he used to walk naruto to any from team 7 practices... i think i was-

_**Hyuugaprincess2 has logged on to Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**_

**Ms. Uchiha: **hyuuga.

**Uchiha Wife: **hyuuga? neji?

**Ms. Uchiha: **no, thats hyuuga hinata online right there

**Hyuugaprincess2: **hello sakura-chan and ino-chan

**Uchiha Wife: **wow, she remembered our screen names...

**Ms. Uchiha: **... sometimes i wonder if your really are a NATURAL dumb blonde...

**Uchiha Wife: **your hair color is the color of a troll doll, so you have no room to talk about me.

**Ms. Uchiha: **YOU WANT TO GO INO?!

**Uchiha Wife: **LETS GO THEN SAKURA!!!

**Hyuugaprincess2: **... why are you two fighting?

**Uchiha Wife: **... cant remember...

**Ms. Uchiha: **you wouldnt...

**Uchiha Wife: **why you-

**Hyuugaprincess2: **now calm down ino. why are you fighting? what started this?

**Ms. Uchiha: **errrr...

**Uchiha Wife: **well, it was about how naruto and sasuke are togeth-

**Ms. Uchiha: **-together on a mission!!!! HAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!!!

**Hyuugaprincess2: **... sakura-chan, you know im not a dummy. i know sasuke and naruto have been going together as boyfriend and boyfriend for a few months now. it was pretty noticeable...

**Ms. Uchiha: **... we didnt find out until 3 weeks ago about them...

**Uchiha Wife: **yea...

**Hyuugaprincess2: **...errr... heheh. i wasnt all that noticable. i guess i saw them when they were more public, huh? haha

**Uchiha Wife: **...sure...

**Hyuugaprincess2: **...yea... anyway, what are you two talking about those two guys?

**Ms. Uchiha: **well, tell me, are you still in love with naruto?

**Hyuugaprincess2: **...yes. yes, i still have feelings for him. i hate that i still do while hes with sasuke, but i do. cant help it.

**Ms. Uchiha: **well, what if i told you that me and ino are working on a plan to slpit the two? what would you say?

**Hyuugaprincess2: **... id say what can i do to help

**Ms. Uchiha and ****Uchiha Wife:** ALRIGHT!!

**Uchiha Wife: **now hinata, we were just... brainstorming ideas on what we would do. we thought it would be better if it was tomorrow, the day of there anniversiry.

**Hyuugaprincess2: **hmmm. i dont know. what if sasuke catchs naruto kissing someone else were they were supose to meet, naruto doesnt see sasuke seeing him kiss someone, sasuke is heart broken and would want nothing to do with naruto, while naruto would fall apart, leaving me to help pick up the pieces.

**Ms. Uchiha: **...err... i think hinata has been thinking into this

**Hyuugaprincess2: **... well, i think of randomly ideas that would bring the two men down once in a while. like i have sasuke murder while on a mission, and nurse naruto back to his normal self, which leads to him falling for me. and theres the one which i have sasuke framed for the killing of three unknown konoha memebers, and while sasuke's away, i shall play. play with naruto that is, since theres only so long before boys give in to there sexual urges.

**Ms. Uchiha: **... damn girl. on the outside your all timid and shy, but inside your all pshyco killer whos craving for the ramen crazy blonde dumbass...

**Uchiha Wife: **... yea dude.

**Hyuugaprincess2: **meh. whatever. now we have to make all the peperation. ill take over the operration. you two will be two of my subordanites.

**Ms. Uchiha: **wait, your taking over the thing WE thought of?!

**Uchiha Wife: **wait, TWO of yourYOUR subordanites?! YOU have SUBORDANITES?!

**Hyuugaprincess2: **yes. i have other help. they should be ariving here soon...

**Krazyeyez has logged on to Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**

**Chickwithknifes has logged on to Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**

**BigBoobBlonde ****has logged on to Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**

**Bloodlover99 has logged on to Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**

**Ms. Uchiha: **wha? Kurenai, TenTen, Tsunade-sama, and Anko?

**Hyuugaprincess2: **yes. they are all under my charge, and i had come online for the main purpose to recriut you two, but we have the same feelings, so it went easyer.

**Uchiha Wife: **wait, so why are they helping seperate naruto

**BigBoobBlonde: **for naruto to find happyness with a girl

**Krazyeyez: **to help out my faithful student, hinata.

**Chickwithknifes: **to get some new weapons

** Bloodlover99: **i got paid to do this.

**Ms. Uchiha: **ah. that makes sense... for some people...

**Hyuugaprincess2: **so the plan will be to have sasuke catch naruto kissing someone tomorrow, there anniversiry. sasuke will dump naruto without even hearing his explaination for what happened. then i shall help him threw the heart break, and over time he shall far for me, we shall become lovers, get married, have kids, retire from the shinobi life, and live happy with the rest of our lives ahead of us! YAY!!!!

**Ms. Uchiha: **... she has this alittle TOO planned out...

**Uchiha Wife: **its like shes been thinking this over for a while

**Hyuugaprincess2: **ha! "a while" is a understatement!

**Uchiha Wife: **... should we trust her?

**Ms. Uchiha: **well, its either that or let naruto and sasuke live there own lives and choose how they should be happy, and spend the rest of there lives together.

**ALL:** _**HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!**_

**Ms. Uchiha: **well, okay its decided how we are going to do this

**Chickwithknifes: **wait, whos going to kiss naruto?

**Krazyeyez: **well, it should be someone who makes sasuke believes that he's lost naruto

**Hyuugaprincess2: **dont worry. ive already got ther perfect person picked out, and he's agreed to help us. in his words "anything for my sexy blonde".

**Uchiha Wife: **who?? WHO?!!

**Hyuugaprincess2: **dont worry. all you two need to do it to get naruto to battleground #107 at 8:15 PM tomorrow.

**Ms. Uchiha: **huh?? our first training grounds? and why at night?

**Hyuugaprincess2: **BAKA!! dont ask questions to your boss, just do it and sasuke will your the both of your!

**Ms. Uchiha and ****Uchiha Wife: **Y-Y-YES MA'AM!!

**Hyuugaprincess2: **but be warned, if you fail me, you shall suffer a fate worst than death!! NEVER FAIL THE #1 SHINOBI MOB CLAN, THE HYUUGA CLAN'S PRINCESSS HYUUGA HINATA!!!!!!! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! ROLL OUT LADYS!!!!!!

_**Hyuugaprincess2 has logged off of Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat **_

_**Krazyeyez has logged off of Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**_

_**Chickwithknifes has logged off of Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**_

_**Bloodlover99 has logged off of Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**_

**Uchiha Wife: **...is it just me, or was that scary on SOOOOO many diffrent levels?

**Ms. Uchiha: **nope, its me too... im scared... of hinata...

**Uchiha Wife: **... i feel sorry for naruto...

**Ms. Uchiha: **... i feel sorry for anyone who crosses hinata...

**Uchiha Wife: **...may they Rest In Peace(R.I.P.)

**Ms. Uchiha: **yes...

**Uchiha Wife: **...

**Ms. Uchiha: **oh well, better them not me!

**Uchiha Wife: **yes!

**Ms. Uchiha: **so, want to go shoping?

**Uchiha Wife: **sure, ill meet you at the mall.

**Ms. Uchiha: **kay, meet you there!

_**Ms. Uchiha has logged off of Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**_

_**Uchiha Wife has logged off of Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**_

**Uchihalover: **Hmm. so there breaking those two up. and i might know whos going to help them too. its unfortionate i didnt over hear anymore. no matter. after sasuke dumps naruto, i shall snatch sasuke from under everyone, and anyone nose's! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHHAHA-

**BigBoobBlonde: **OY! WHOS THERE!! OROCHIMARU AGAIN??! DAMNIT! ILL KILL YOU!!!

**Uchihalover: **oh crap.

_**Uchihalover has logged off of Konoha Chat8: Girl Chat**_

**BigBoobBlonde: **damnit! he heared our whole plan. well, i am only looking out for naruto, not sasuke really. but i am the hoakge now... but sasuke creeps me out so orochimaru can have em.

* * *

Meh. maybe i should have worded the disclaimer diffrently above. might get sued or soemthing... meh. too lazy now. anyway, things are heating up! so many sidestories, all coming together with a BOOM!! ... or something like that. heheh. its fun to tease about the boyfriend thing since noone knows who it could be. MUAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Man, i loved writing this chapter, making hinata all evil. TOTALLY out of chatacter, but thats how i could imagine her sometimes. lol. just threw in the mob thing just because. lol! go and review, and look out for the next chapter!  



	11. Chapter 11

well, here i am again with a new chapther, starting this one at about 2:00 in the morening since im restless and bored. lol. also, im waiting for the anime naruto to come out sub. this is number 221, after the time skip, or the way they call it: Naruto Shippuden( Naruto Hurricane Chronicle), so yea, im still waiting for awhile. i hear in just a few hours it should be open, so its all good . now, onto the story!

Note: dont own naruto, but i do own is twin brother karuto! lol! and also note this has alot of cursing... but if your one of my regular readers, you know this, and your minds are gone anyway if your willing to read this, so read on!!

* * *

**_Akatsuki Zero000 has logged on to Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!_**

**Akatsuki Zero000:** Hmm. secure chat. the others can now come. ASEMABLE!

_**UchihaRuler001 ****has logged on to Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

_**SharkBait002 ****has logged on to Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

_**ArtistofClay003 ****has logged on to Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

_**BakaN00b00? ****has logged on to Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

_**Fabiolookalike005 ****has logged on to Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

_**Moneyman006 ****has logged on to Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

**Moneyman006: **uhh... someone want to tell me what the fuck is up with the stupid chat name?

**Akatsuki Zero000:** oh that... we let tobi decided... my mistake...

**BakaN00b00?: **HAASahahaA!! COOOCclOOLLL!!!

**UchihaRuler001: **... damn, what a freakin retard...

**Fabiolookalike005: **so whats the point of us being here? ive got a bid on ebay for a mirror, since my last one was broken by... you know...

**ArtistofClay003: **damn, im sorry, stop bitchin over it. mm.

**Fabiolookalike005: **NO!

**ArtistofClay003: **one word: letitgo! mm!

**Fabiolookalike005: **thats three words your dumb fuck!

**ArtistofClay003: **no, not the way i say it: letitgo!

**BakaN00b00?: **yay! 1 word!!! tobi ish good boi!!

**Moneyman006: **...can we burn him yet?

**Akatsuki Zero000:** nope. its annoying, but hes needed around here.

**Moneyman006: **for what?!! what good can that n00b possablily be good for?!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** ... he makes kick ass ramen...

**Moneyman006: **...yep

**SharkBait002: **true

**UchihaRuler001: **it was like heaven in a bowl

**ArtistofClay003: **got to learn to cook like THAT! mm!

**Fabiolookalike005: **damn, if he taught me how to make it like that, i may let him have his way with me... joke!!

**Moneyman006: **...

**UchihaRuler001: **...

**ArtistofClay003: **... mm.

**SharkBait002: **...kaaaaaaaaaay...

**Akatsuki Zero000:** anyway, we are here for one thing: the planing for Itachi BIRTHDAY PARTY!!!!!!

**BakaN00b00?: **yay!!!! tobi get choco cake!!!

**SharkBait002: **no!!!! its going to be lemon!!!!!

**Fabiolookalike005: **no! its going to be Louisiana crunch cake bitches!!!

**Moneyman006: **hell no! i hate coconuts! you know that! lets get a germany chocolate cake!

**ArtistofClay003: **an ice cream cake!!! mm.

**SharkBait002: **ohh!! upside down cake!!!

**BakaN00b00?: **lets get a pie!

**Moneyman006: **your suspose to get a cake, on someones b-day, not a pie, you retard!!!!

**BakaN00b00?: **me not retard!!!

**Moneyman006: **yes you are you freakin Dee Dee Dee!!!! (look up carlos mencia, dee dee dee song if you dont know what i mean. lol)

**BakaN00b00?: **you durrrrrrr!!

**Moneyman006: **durrrr yourself! mm.

**SHUT. THE. HELL. UPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**Fabiolookalike005: **... someones cranky, becoming 25...

**ArtistofClay003: **the big two-five. your life is a quarter done. hell, in ninja years, its already half way over! mm.

**UchihaRuler001: **dont make me stab you to death!!!

**ArtistofClay003: **dont make me tickle you to death!! mm!!

**UchihaRuler001: **damn it i hate you!

**ArtistofClay003: **and i think your a pretty boy. and veeeeeeeeeerry pretty boy. hehehe mmm!

**UchihaRuler001: **... someone remind me why we stuck together for so long?

**ArtistofClay003: **world domination? mm?

**UchihaRuler001: **yea. something like that...

**Akatsuki Zero000:** no! it was to destory the shinobi villages!!

**Moneyman006: **hmm. thought it was to get to white castle...

**SharkBait002: **wasn't it to get high?

**Fabiolookalike005: **no,it must have been to be the king of games...

**BakaN00b00?: **no, it was to gather all the dragon balls and-

**UchihaRuler001: **okay, ive got to get out of here...

**SharkBait002: **wait! we still havent discussed your b-day party!!!!

**UchihaRuler001: **let me make this CRYSTAL clear!! I. DO. NOT. WANT. A BIRTHDAY. PARTY!!!!!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** hmmm. so its going to be a ice cream cake?

**BakaN00b00?: **yay!!!! icykake!!!!

**UchihaRuler001: **damnit. i should let the retard take my place

**SharkBait002: **NOOOOOO!!!!!! NO RETARD AS MY PARTNER!!!!! ONLY SEXY UCHIHA!!!!!!

**UchihaRuler001: **if you want something like that, go stalk my little brother.

**SharkBait002: **you dont mind?

**UchihaRuler001: **nope. im after his brother anyway, so i could care less about his well being and stuff

**SharkBait002: **kool!! itachi ish good bro!!!

**UchihaRuler001: **wow, hes like tobi now...

**BakaN00b00?: **tobi good boi!!!!!!!

**ArtistofClay003: **oh!!! i know what im getting ichi!!! mm!

**UchihaRuler001: **what?

**ArtistofClay003: **well, i cant say with him online you know... mm!

**UchihaRuler001: **it doesnt matter. ill crush it as soon as i get it, and ill burn all the other gifts and decloration... well, unless you get me some porn. that ill keep. but anything else, ill burn!!!

**BakaN00b00?: **yay!! tobi got ichiii porn!!! Bestiality!!

**UchihaRuler001: **what?!!

**BakaN00b00?: **yep! got orochi-san with a snake!!

**Moneyman006: **...creepy...

**UchihaRuler001: **tobi, i dont want that!!!!

**BakaN00b00?: **also got kyuubi-chan playing himself solo!!

**UchihaRuler001: **i want it now!!! bring it to me NOW!!!!!!!

**BakaN00b00?: **have to waaaaaaaaaait!!! haha!!!

**UchihaRuler001: **damn... have to get rid of my... "problem" now...

**BakaN00b00?: **ohh!! tobi can help!!!

**UchihaRuler001: **... no, no you cant...

**SharkBait002: **yay!!! i got my water floaters!!!!!!

**Fabiolookalike005: **... why do you need floaters?!

**SharkBait002: **... i cant swim...

**Akatsuki Zero000:** WHAT??!

**ArtistofClay003: **WHAT??! mm?!

**Fabiolookalike005: **WHAT??!

**Moneyman006: **WHAT??!

**BakaN00b00?: ** WAHTN?! even tobi know how swim!!

**UchihaRuler001: **so enbarrising as a partner...

**SharkBait002: **so!! why do you all think i can swim?!!

**Fabiolookalike005: **... YOUR A SHARK, DUMASS!!!

**SharkBait002: **i only LOOK like a shark!!! you freaking fabio wannabe!!

**Fabiolookalike005: **you came from the mist village, which is SURROUNDED BY WATER!!!! and i never claimed to be him sharkboy. how do you not know how to swim?!

**SharkBait002: **i can walk on water, remember. didnt see the need to learn after i learned to walk on the water...

**Akatsuki Zero000:** you have super sharp teeth.

**Moneyman006: **your skin and slits on your neck looks like a shark!!

**ArtistofClay003: **your sword is even sharkskin! mm!!

**BakaN00b00?: **sharky!!!!

**SharkBait002: **IM NOT A SHARK!!! I JUST LOOK LIKE ONE!!!!

**Moneyman006: **you LOOK like a dumass if your not a shark. wow, that must mean your mother was uuuuuuuuuugly!!

**Fabiolookalike005: **U-G-L-Y, she aint got no allby, she-

**SharkBait002: **shut the fuck up about my mom!!!!

**ArtistofClay003: **hmmm. dad screw a shark? mm?

**SharkBait002: **DAMNIT!!! NO RESPECT!!!!!!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** stop. you'll make him spit ink.

**SharkBait002: **THATS AN SQUID!!!!!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** ... whats the difference?

**SharkBait002: **DAMNIT!!!!!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** now calm down sharky- err, Kisame. we came here from a good reason, and that was for ichi's birthday party

**UchihaRuler001: **NO! I DONT WANT THE SPOT LIGHT!!

**Fabiolookalike005: **so we'll have it where?

**SharkBait002: **hmm. how bout where ichi started out? konoha?

**UchihaRuler001: **NOOOOOOOOOOOO- wait. maybe...

**ArtistofClay003: **yea! i can pick up ichi's present there! mm!

**Fabiolookalike005: **wait, how are we getting into konoha anyway?

**UchihaRuler001: **meh. just pretend to be someone else. hell, the gaurd there is so easy to fool that ichi could walk in there, say that they forgot about him being a missing nin, and they'ed just let him go with a welcome back!!

**Moneyman006: **yep.

**Akatsuki Zero000:** so its going to be in konoha, but were in there?

**BakaN00b00?: **how bout ichi old house?

**UchihaRuler001: **nope. with that big amount of land that was left unused, the last living uchiha in konoha, my little brother, decided to make it a mall. i do believe its call Kitsune Mall or something...

**BakaN00b00?: **yay! shopin!!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** hmm. wonder why he picked that name...

**ArtistofClay003: **for his blond bitch of coruse

**UchihaRuler001: **HES NOT A BITCH!!!!! HES MINE!!!!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** hes OURS. we have to use the demon inside of the brat to complete our master plan

**UchihaRuler001: **NO! I WONT LET YOU! ILL FIGHT YOU ALL!!!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** red eyes, chill out will ya. how bout we take him last of all containers, leaving him to you to do whatever with him until we kill him.

**UchihaRuler001: **meh. sure, why not. by then, ill be done with him. heheheheheheheehehehee.

**Akatsuki Zero000:** ... kay. anyway, WERE will the party be at?

**SharkBait002: **lets have it at your brothers house ichi!

**UchihaRuler001: **well, we could, but it might be a mood killer when he keeps trying to kill me.

**Fabiolookalike005: **wow, that would be a party pooper.

**UchihaRuler001: **yea. i mean, just because i killed our whole clan! i left him alive! and i was like, what, a billion years ago or somethin?

**BakaN00b00?: **yea! ichi should be forgivin!! ichi good!! uchiha bad!!!

**UchihaRuler001: **damn, i would kill you, but i need you alive to make ramen, since my soon to be slave loves the stuff to death. i think ive seen him put away like 20 bowls. and in jusst a half an hour. and were he puts it all-

**Fabiolookalike005: **wait, how did you see him?

**UchihaRuler001: **meh. i guess i was spying on him... once or twice. like you said, its easy to get into konoha... 8 times tops... maybe 12...

**ArtistofClay003: **haha!! uzumaki stalker!!!! hehe.

**UchihaRuler001: **am not!

**ArtistofClay003: **are too! mm!

**UchihaRuler001: **am not!

**ArtistofClay003: **are too! mm!

**UchihaRuler001: **wait, are you trying to trick me?

**ArtistofClay003: **... damn. i knew it would only work on tobi...

**BakaN00b00?: **does not!

**ArtistofClay003: **does too! mm!

**BakaN00b00?: **does not!

**ArtistofClay003: **does not! mm!

**BakaN00b00?: **does too! wait, wha?

**ArtistofClay003: **and that one didnt even take long to confuse him.mm.

**BakaN00b00?: **????

**Fabiolookalike005: **anything doesnt take too long to confuse him really...

**BakaN00b00?: **i want cake!!!

**Fabiolookalike005: **so, ichi's birthday is tomorrow, so we should all get there from tonight till tomorrow. we'll start at 9:00

**Akatsuki Zero000:** yea. i should be alittle late, but if i run all te way there, full speed, without being stopped by hunter-nin and stuff, i should make it.

**UchihaRuler001: **ok, fine. have the damn party! see if i care!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** ...okay. now, why dont we have it... at ichi's blonlde's house?

**UchihaRuler001: **no! you'll try to capture him for the sacrifice! were not having it there! hmm... we could hold it in the uchiah mansion. it wasnt part of the original uchiha clan land, so it wasnt destoryed. only i and sasuke know about it. its by a beach and everything. our fanily use to go there for family fun. _sigh _good times. too bad i had to up and kill them.

**ArtistofClay003: **yea, that is a shame... mm...

**Moneyman006: **hell, if you were my son, i would have killed you for jusr looking at me wrong

**BakaN00b00?: **yay!! killy!!!! kill people!! TOBI KILL!!!!!!

**Moneyman006: **tobi, put down the kuani!! no, not my computer!! it cost me soooooo much moneyyyyyyyyy-

_**Moneyman006 ****has logged off of Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

**Fabiolookalike005: **hmm i should go help him... but im going to go look shopping. bye!

_**Fabiolookalike005**__**has logged on to Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

**ArtistofClay003: **mm. i should go stop tobi since he's my partner, but Kakuzu didnt lend me some money for somemore clay, so screw him. im going to buy ichi a present. bye! mm!

_**ArtistofClay003 has logged off of Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

**SharkBait002: **so, were is everyone anyway?

**Akatsuki Zero000:** in im lighting country

**Akatsuki Zero000:** everone else is near hidden rain, were the new hideout is

**UchihaRuler001: **we're in fire country, not that far from konoha. ill set up the stuff. all you guys have to do is get here and bring me good crap, okay?!

**SharkBait002: **kay.

**Akatsuki Zero000:** why not.

**UchihaRuler001: **damnit, weres zetsu?

**Akatsuki Zero000:** well, he had something to do, but ill inform him of the plan when i see him. hes near me in the hidden rain. i think ill go look for him now. later.

_**Akatsuki Zero000 has logged off of Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

**SharkBait002: **so, what now?

**UchihaRuler001: **well, we get moving. we have to be in konoha by tomorrow. hmmm. it seems like im forgetting something...

**SharkBait002: **hey, didnt you have to go to konoha anyway?

**UchihaRuler001: **... OH YEA!!!!!! now i remember. i have a job.

**SharkBait002: **job?

**UchihaRuler001: **yea, i was hired by someone, so i get some money to do osmething for them. i need to be in konoha to do it. lets go!!

**SharkBait002: **wait! i have to send the shiping information for my floaties!

**UchihaRuler001: **come on damnit!

**SharkBait002: **wait for me!!!

_**UchihaRuler001 has logged off of Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

_**SharkBait002 has logged off of Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

**BakaN00b00?: **damn. couldnt kill. tobi sad...

**BakaN00b00?: **... guys? anyone there?

**BakaN00b00?: **finally! now i can stop acting dumb and use my brain. wow, it almosts hurts to talk the way i do. funny. they have no clue that im really super smart, and was kicked out of my village for the knowledge i hold. oh well. now maybe i should go read a telling tale of the adventures of-

**_Akatsuki Zero000 has logged on to Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!_**

**Akatsuki Zero000:** oi, tobi, are you still on?

**BakaN00b00?: **yes, i a- err. i mean TObi IsH HErrrRRR!!!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** hey, make sure to lock up the new hideout before you leave for konoha, okay?

**BakaN00b00?: **KKKKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAAYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DJASFER W!!!!!

**Akatsuki Zero000:** heh, same old stupid tobi.

_**Akatsuki Zero000 has logged off of Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

**BakaN00b00?: ** hehehehehe. yes, same old tobi. MUAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA- i want a cookie.

_**BakaN00b00? has logged off of Konoha Chat-0: super secret hidden chat that you dont know about so HA!**_

* * *

yay! im done. wow, it almost hurt thinking like tobi. lol. its a twist to make him a secret smart, huh. meh. might as well make ichi's b-day the same day as the anniversiry, just to add drama. lol. and i know what your thinking about ichi's job, but you have no idea, trust me. **sigh** im not all that in the mood to re-read this to make sure theres no super wrong spelling, unless it belongs to tobi, so bear with me. i just know when i look at this page after i put it out, im going to think of something i forgot to put in or i misspelled something or some other crap, so yea. well, i fell asleep half way typing this, so naruto 221 should be out, so im going to go watch it now! bye, and leave reviews or the bunny gets it!! 


	12. Chapter 12

Guess ive left you all waiting enough, eh? guess ive been a bit on the lazy side ever since school started. heck, im tired, but i own it to you who love this story. all keep in mind im trying to connect all of this at the top of my head, and thinking what ill write this very moment. well, lets hope for the best!

* * *

**BlondeKitsune: **and i was all like "woah" and hes all "dude" and- 

**Ravenhair69:** naruto, will you SHUT UP! damn, im not THAT interested in your day.

**BlondeKitsune: **... you yelled at me...

**Ravenhair69: **yea, well, get over it.

**BlondeKitsune: **your not suspose to yell at me. Your suspose to watch over me, and love me, and kill anyone who looks at me in a fuckable wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

**Ravenhair69:** first, stop whining! second, except for the last one, those things dont really matter.

**BlondeKitsune: **then sex must not matter to you!

**Ravenhair69:**... fine. whatever. whine and bitch and complain. whatever.

**BlondeKitsune: **yay! sasuke-bastard is my bitch now!

**Ravenhair69: **ey, dont get it twisted!

**BlondeKitsune: **what, you wanna go?!

**Ravenhair69: **no need, since id kick your sorry ass anyway!

**BlondeKitsune: **WHAT?!

**Ravenhair69:** you heard me, you dead last idiot!

**BlondeKitsune: **why i-

_**IchaLover has logged on to Konoha Chat1**_

**IchaLover:** yo

**BlondeKitsune: **oi, kakashi, plz tell sasuke-bastard that he'd get his ass kicked by me!

**IchaLover:** i could, but then i would have to lie alittle...

**BlondeKitsune: **hey!

**Ravenhair69: **idiot

**BlondeKitsune: **bastard!!

**IchaLover:** you two stop bitching.

**BlondeKitsune: **im not bitching!

**Ravenhair69:** stop whining

**BlondeKitsune: **shut the hell up! everyones against me!!!!

**IchaLover:** clam down brat. i need to talk to both of you anyway...

**BlondeKitsune: **... for what?

**IchaLover:** its about you two and sex.

**BlondeKitsune: **what??? nooooooooo!!!! not the talk!!!!!!!!!

**IchaLover:** i was hoping to catch you two before iruka had a chance to get to yo-

**_StudentSlave has logged on to Konoha Chat1._**

**IchaLover:** damn.

**StudentSlave: **NARUTO ARE YOU HERE?!!!!

**IchaLover:** the caps...

**StudentSlave: **opps

**Ravenhair69: **wow, looks like you and naruto do have some of the same "idiotic" traits, huh?

**BlondeKitsune: **bastard!

**StudentSlave: **naruto, we must talk about your sssssssssssssssee... seeeeeeee... you ssssssssss. damn it, i cant say it. i just cant!

**IchaLover:** how you and sasuke fuck till you drop.

**StudentSlave: **kakashi!! watch your mouth!

**BlondeKitsune: **so embarrising...

**Ravenhair69:** hm.

**IchaLover:** anyway, we need to know details.

**BlondeKitsune: **what?!

**StudentSlave: **yes. even though its hard to admit, you two are doing... doing...

**IchaLover:** each other?

**StudentSlave: **IT! So we must know details about the... experience...

**Ravenhair69:** well, first i have him do alittle strip tease for me, going slow and making sure to show off his-

**BlondeKitsune: **WOAH! thats enough! why do you two what to know?!

**IchaLover:** because as the two of us mostly watch over you as parental units, we are looking out for your best interest

**BlondeKitsune: **and that means you must know the details of our sex life?

**IchaLover:** yep.

**Ravenhair69:** and i thought kakashi was a pervert before...

**IchaLover:** hey!

**BlondeKitsune: **true

**StudentSlave: **anyway! its important that you use l-lube

**BlondeKitsune: **well, thats not a problem, since sasuke just brought me some lube yesterday. i came in a gift basket from sasuke! it had all this stuff-

**Ravenhair69:** wait, hold on! i didnt buy you squat!

**BlondeKitsune: **huh?

**Ravenhair69:** i didnt buy you a damn thing! who the hell is sending my bitch lube!

**BlondeKitsune: **sasuke!

**StudentSlave: **hey!

**IchaLover:** good question

**BlondeKitsune: **you mean you didnt send me a gift basket filled with lube, dirty movies, a book of sexual positions, condoms, naked pictues without the head shown, a lock of your black hair that looks like yours, multi-colored dildos, 3 sizes of butt plugs, sexy lingerie, and Edible thongs?

**Ravenhair69:** ... _sweats_

**IchaLover:** ... _blinks_

**StudentSlave: **... _faints_

**IchaLover:** looks like he fainted at his computer.

**BlondeKitsune: **whats wrong?

**Ravenhair69:** ... i never sent you any of that stuff...

**BlondeKitsune: **... WHA?!

**IchaLover:** why did you think he brought it?

**BlondeKitsune: **WELL ,I REALLY DIDNT QUESTION IT SINCE IT CAME WITH RAMEN FLAVORED LUBE!

**IchaLover:** ... what the fuck? they make that?

**BlondeKitsune: **YEP. THE FLAVORS I HAVE ARE BEEF, CHICKEN, ORIENTAL, SPICY VEG., AND SOME OTHER KINDS.

**Ravenhair69:** how many times must i tell you to take off your fucking caps!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **opps ...meh.

**Ravenhair69:** what an idiot...

**IchaLover:** yep...

**StudentSlave: **my pure... na...rut..o... noooooooooooooooo!!!! why, god, WHY?!!!!!!

**IchaLover:** calm down babe, its not that bad...

**StudentSlave: **... so... cold... can... see... light... grandma? is that you? and it that... sparky? my dead ... dog... im coming...

**BlondeKitsune: **nooo! dont die! ill never have sex again!!

**Ravenhair69:** the hell you wont!!!

**BlondeKitsune: **sasuke! hes about to die!

**Ravenhair69:** better him then me! dead from blue balls!

**BlondeKitsune: **whatever teme, i must go and keep him alive!

**_BlondeKitsune has logged off of konohachat1_**

**IchaLover:** what a couple of over dramatic's.

**Ravenhair69:** seriously

**IchaLover:** anyway, are you or are you not taking advantage of naruto good nature and abusing him and having him in every which way?

**Ravenhair69:** well of course

**IchaLover:** thats my boy!

**Ravenhair69:** hmmm.. i wonder who sent naruto all that stuff... i may have someone going for narutos heart. it could be narutos last boyfriend...

**IchaLover:** really? you think

**Ravenhair69:** its possable. and to think, naruto asked me not to kill him. well, THAT was a big mistake!

**IchaLover:** now sasuke, you have no idea if it was him or not

**Ravenhair69:** well, i could kill him anyway. just for the heck of it, you know?

**IchaLover:** no, you couldnt. naruto would be mad at you

**Ravenhair69:** meh. one night of hot sex, and he'll forget about it.

**UNKNOWNUSER0: **do you reeeeeeeeally think you could kill me? and who could forget about me?

**IchaLover:** wha? whos that?

**UNKNOWNUSER0: **i think you two know.

**Ravenhair69:** so its you.

**IchaLover:** yo.

**UNKNOWNUSER0: **hello kakashi. sasuke

**Ravenhair69:** let me tell you this here and now that your not winning back naruto, and your little presents wont work, since me and naruto are always and forever together.

**UNKNOWNUSER0: **... how corny. and thats crap too. naruto wants me. you've just infected his mind with your stupid ideas of "love" and "trust" and thst crap. relationships are all about a good fuck. thats it, and once i get naurto back, ill give him the fuck of his life.

**Ravenhair69:** but you forget one thing: dead men cant fuck, now can they?

**UNKNOWNUSER0: **i aint dead yet.

**IchaLover:** boys, boys, lets calm down

**UNKNOWNUSER0: **kakashi, im not hear to talk to you. when sasuke left to be with orochimaru, i stepped in and was there for him.

**Ravenhair69:** only to fuck! there was nothing else to the relationship!!

**UNKNOWNUSER0: **so. like you cared

**Ravenhair69:** im back now, aint i?

**UNKNOWNUSER0: **yes, and when you came back, you told naruto your feelings, and naruto fell for your trap of the heart. but i will bust naruto from that trap and bring him back home. were he belongs. with me and only me.

**Ravenhair69:** it is not wrong to have emotions and let the other see you at your weakness. it only means you have a strong relationship, and could depend on each other. i could tell naruto any of my secrets and he would only care for me more, and the same for him. i may call him an idiot, but i love that stupid son of a bitch, and if you think your going to take him from me, ill torture you until pigs can fly high in the sky!!!!

**UNKNOWNUSER0: **... huh? i wasnt paying attention. i was listening to music on my computer. anyway, ill see you soon. too bad you may not be quick enough to see me. hahaha!!!

_**UNKNOWNUSER0**** has logged off of konohachat1**_

**Ravenhair69:** grrrrrrrrrr.

**IchaLover:** wow. thats very un-uchiha like of you, sasuke

**Ravenhair69:** yea, and if you tell naruto ANY of what was said today, ill kill you. and thats no joke.

**IchaLover:** okay, okay, chill out. i have no wishes to tell naruto.

**Ravenhair69:** whatever. later

_**Ravenhair69 has logged out of konohachat1**_

**IchaLover:** hmmm. i gather u heared that ikura?

**StudentSlave: **...yes...

**IchaLover:** good, now i dont have to bother telling you about it. now do you any doubts about sasuke?

**StudentSlave: **no. i think sasuke will be with nartuo till the end... or until sasuke slips up and trys to make naruto choose between him and ramen. that fight could lean in the ramens favor.

**IchaLover:** yep. its like me and my books.

**StudentSlave: **i wanted to talk to you about that-

**IchaLover:** you see, if you EVER had to me choose, i think i would have to choose my books, since they've been there since i was a teen. everything i need are in those books. wait, did you want to say something iku-chan?

**StudentSlave: **errr... nope. not a thing

**IchaLover:** good. ill be over in a few minutes so we can pick up from this morning. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!

**StudentSlave: **... im scared...

* * *

meh. since im in a bit of a groove this weekend, ill try typing more of it. i felt this chapter could be better, but meh, i jusst wanted to get this out so i dont drop any readers. MUHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!! lol  



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